“Holland is pregnant?” Aaron asked.
“Well, not Cass!” She wasn’t sure if the statement coming out of her mouth was meant to be funny, sarcastic, or mean, It was none of those things. It was ignored.
“No, that’s not possible.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said, but… she’s sure.”
Aaron shook his head. “It can’t be. It’s not possible.”
“Are you sure? I mean, we thought a Guardian couldn’t kill a Hunter, too, didn’t we? And this whole bit with the serum? We didn’t think it would do anything. What about the rest of the crazy things going on? I think just about anything is possible right now.”
He only stared at her for a long moment, still not accepting the information she’d provided, so Cadence decided to give up. Maybe he didn’t believe her because he couldn’t. Maybe he knew his own capacity better than anyone and knew pressing that bit of information into his already overworked mind would cause a complete meltdown, one that couldn’t simply be rebooted.
She took a deep breath for the hundredth time. “Why don’t you come home?”
“I can’t do that, not yet. I have too much to do.”
“Is it anything Hannah can handle?”
“Nope.”
“Aaron, seriously, this has been going on for at least three weeks now. You’ve got to get a handle on it. I’m worried about you. We are all worried about you.” She leaned forward and thought about getting up and going around the desk and wrapping her arms around him, but she knew the expression he wore, and he wouldn’t have been receptive to that, so she stayed on the edge of her seat.
“I know, Cadence. I’m an emotional empath. I feel what you all feel. You’re worried about me; I become more worried about me. I get it.” He shook his head slightly, like he was stuck in a vicious cycle.
“Do you think if we stopped worrying so much, it would help?” She made the suggestion only because it was the only one she could think of.
“I don’t know. I don’t think so. There’s something else. I just… don’t know what it is.”
“Something else that’s worrying you, that idea that something terrible is about to happen?”
“Yeah, I guess.” He sat back in his chair looking more exhausted than Cadence could ever remember seeing him. “I just can’t put my finger on it, and it’s, well, you know.”
“Right. But you’re not crazy.”
“So you say.”
“So I know. Stop thinking that way!” She wanted to say or else he’d end up in a looney bin, but then she thought that was too much.
They sat in silence for some of the longest moments in her life, and Cadence stared down at her big, sparkly engagement ring, remembering how happy they’d been the day he’d given it to her, despite the fact they’d been leaving Elliott’s funeral. Another example of something she would’ve never thought was possible happening right before her eyes. “There’s so much we don’t know.”
“Vampires cannot procreate.”
“I know. But maybe….”
“If Vampires can procreate, then the universe doesn’t make any sense anymore, and I give up.”
“Right. Okay. Vampires cannot procreate.” She stood, thinking it was best if she didn’t overwhelm him anymore. “I’ve gotta go. Jamie wants us in the operating room at 8:00, and you know that’s early for me.”
“All right.” He folded his hands on his desk but didn’t look at her.
“Do you think you’ll be home at all tonight?”
“Probably not.”
“Okay.” She studied him for another long moment, but he still didn’t even glance up, so she turned and walked away, the “I love you” stuck on the tip of her tongue as she remembered he hadn’t even said it back to her earlier, though she’d felt that he did then. Now… she didn’t know if he was capable of feeling anything but sadness.
Cadence couldn’t control her tears as she made her way back to her apartment building. She tried to brush them aside, but thinking about how she’d felt that night in Ireland when she was certain he was gone forever flooded her memory, and she thought about what it might be like to lose him. Now, he really could change himself back into a human if he wanted to, or at least he should be able to, assuming there was nothing from the second dose of Transformation serum that would prevent him from doing so. Would he try that again? Would he do something even more rash and find a Hunter to end it all? She had no idea what to do about any of it, but she needed to find a way to help him.
“Hey, kid, what’s goin’ on? You been visitin’ with Mr. Sunshine?”
Her tears had clouded her vision to the point that she didn’t even see Elliott until he opened the door to the apartment building, letting out more light, and illuminating his large frame. “Oh, hi. Uh, yeah.”
“You wanna talk about it?”
Cadence checked the time. It was almost 10:00, which she wouldn’t have considered late if she didn’t have to get up so early for the procedure. Elliott didn’t need sleep, so he probably hadn’t even glanced at the clock. “I don’t know,” she said, stepping inside. This time of night, there was only one other person in the lobby, the woman behind the counter who was there in the off chance someone would need help with something, which wasn’t usually the case.
“Well, the bar is open, or we can go to your place. Something tells me he won’t be there. Can’t go to mine, though. It’s infested. With teenagers.” He wrinkled up his nose like they were the worst kind of rodents.
Despite her recent rat encounter, Cadence giggled, knowing her sister wouldn’t be one of those pests since Cass would have had to head home as soon as she was done giving Cadence the information she’d requested. “I don’t think the bar is a good idea since we have to go under in the morning.”
“Apparently, you are not familiar with my capacity to drink,” he replied. “But I understand, you lightweight. Come on.” He took her hand, like she was a little child, and she let him.
They made their way up to her apartment, and he unlocked the door. Cadence collapsed on the couch as Elliott headed to the kitchen, which didn’t surprise her. He came back with a beer and a water, the second of which he handed to her. “What’s goin’ on?”
She took a sip of the water and said, “Did Cass tell you? Holland is pregnant.”
“Holy shit.” He dropped down on the couch, sprawled out like he owned the place, and Cadence guessed he hadn’t heard before. “Well, that’s a new one.”
“Yeah. Cass seemed pretty sure that her intel was accurate.”
“I don’t doubt it. She is usually right.” He took a swig of his Bud and set it on the coffee table, careful to use a coaster, not that Cadence would’ve minded, but he knew where he was.
“Yeah. But Aaron refused to consider the possibility that it might be true.”
Elliott raised an eyebrow at her but didn’t say anything for a long time. He’d known Aaron many more years than she had, though not the longest of the LIGHTS team members. Still, they’d been close friends for decades. “Maybe it was too much.”
“Maybe.” She could feel the tears start to sting her eyes again. “I’ve never seen him like this before, Elliott. Have you? I mean, what is happening?”
He shook his head. “No, never. I don’t know.”
“I mean, even when you were dead, he seemed to be able to tolerate it somehow, just as much as the rest of us.”
“He almost killed himself.” His voice was matter-of-fact, like he was telling her the time.
“No, I know, but not on purpose. He wasn’t trying to kill himself.”
“He was trying to escape all of this, though, right? One way or another?”
“Yes… but he wasn’t suicidal.” She felt confident that he hadn’t meant to hurt himself when he took Christian’s stupid word for the fact that the serum was ready to use. When she’d found him, he didn’t want to die. Did he? No… he didn’t. She was sure.
“Look, Aaron’s a complex fellow. I don’t quite understand what all he’s capable of now with this new superpower. I hope to understand a little more after tomorrow, but I don’t know what he’s thinking or what’s going on. I keep telling myself maybe it will pass, but so far, it just seems to be getting worse.”
“Rapidly. Today seems ten times worse than yesterday.” It was her turn to shake her head. She took another sip of her water, wondering if she should call Jamie and let him know what they had found out about Holland. Maybe he would have some insight into the situation with Aaron, too. But then, she was pretty sure the doctor had plans with Ashley that night, and since that relationship was fairly new, she didn’t want to butt in. It probably wouldn’t help anyway.
“Maybe Hannah could do one of those emotional blocker things, like we had her do when we wanted to see if Eliza was really a siren. Maybe he’s soaking up too much of our bad juju.”
