Chapter 8 - Bike Show

   Its always nice to have JG come in, and even more so for a long weekend. We both like meeting with him, we go back a ways and share. People that have been through things and came through and got on top of it? You shared danger and excitement. You all pulled together, you all did your parts. And in the end, it all worked out. It doesn't always. Sometimes? You lose someone close to you. Sometimes? You come through the other end and win.

   I had it both ways. I can tell you which one I prefer. Its one of those no brains required choices. You just don't always get to make that choice, sometimes it gets made for you. By your actions you don't always realize the exact implications of until its too late, what and why it happened.

   Its also nice to have JG come in, because he tends to do it passing through Szarabjorna's cutting house, and ensuring its going smoothly. The lion's share of that, is him keeping an eye on her growing bank of hard drives. She's important to me, and now to Panic as well. JG likes her and doesn't seem to really mind the little bit of extra work, because to him? The tech end of the server setup and bank of hard drive storage is a routine thing for him to oversee and check on.

   We took JG with us to the doughnut shop, then we did the diner ritual and the chief joined us. The chief likes JG, and hell he likes having FBI contacts. If he has any real questions about anything he wonders about? Most small town chiefs can't just call up direct access to people like JG let alone someone like Uncle Mike, and get answers and friendly voices. You get gently brushed off or given the polite runaround until you get the hint. Don't call "dad" at work, dad's important and busy.

   The chief enjoys his access, and really Mike likes giving it to him. Mike likes having direct access back, to keeping tabs on me. Mike likes developing contacts above him or below him, and anywhere he can cultivate such things. Who knows if he'll ever want to operate somewhere nearby, and the chief can give him direct access and bypass layers of whatever to get him in to whoever can best help him.

   The chief related that he's going to try to keep Louie around, if for no other reason than until he can get a decent replacement if he needs to. Or? The way the chief explained it. One gigantic screw up like this one? You can sometimes get a very appreciative underling out of it, when you don't shit-can them and ruin the rest of their fledgling career right off the bat. He's doing a wait and see which way Lou seems to go.

   The chief was talking lightly, and doing his usual comedy routine he's known for with friends at the diner ritual.

   "Hey. You guys wanna have some fun with Louie? You can help me try to train him. You guys game?"

   JG shrugged. Me and Panic shrugged as well. Panic quipped him.

   "Depends. Its your ballgame, chief. But what do you expect us to do."

   "Nothing. Just sit there and act like nothing happened. Eh?"

   So he ended up calling him.

   "Louie? You home sulking? Uh huh. Beam your ass down to the the diner. Unless you don't want breakfast. What? Yeah. You're still in the doghouse. Doesn't mean you can't get a free breakfast. See you in a little bit."

   It was a whole different Lou. The quiet and reserved kid was back, and with that whipped dog look on top of it. The chief acted like nothing had happened.

   "So Lou. You'll be doing without a paycheck for a couple weeks. I figured I'll pitch in with the occasional breakfast. I'm trying to get through to you, not starve you to death. You know how this really happened?"

   "I guess you'll tell me."

   "Pussy, Lou. You're a young kid. A cute girl tugged on your prick. Boo hoo, help poor little me out. Now? Look what it got you. Just try to learn from this fiasco, kid. Pussy? Has gotten better guys than you, into way more trouble before. It happens. Honestly? I hold her more responsible, than you. She knew what she was doing. You though? All you saw, was I wanna impress this girl. And I get that. You embarrassed about all this?"

   "Yeah. Sure."

   "I bet. Look. I got kind of a one strike rule. You? Got your one strike out of the way. Keep your nose clean. All right?"

   "Yeah, chief. And thanks."

   "All right. Now. You already met Panic, and Merry here. I guess you know he owns the old bank building, its a gun store now. He's also a consultant. He works for the FBI."

   "Oh. I… didn't know that."

   "Right. And why would you. That's why I just told you that. And yeah, Merry works out at the biker bar part time. She's not a biker, girls can't join. She's friends with those guys, and tends bar. Honestly, that biker bar? The boys don't raise hell like you might be used to other places. They're pretty much less problems than all the regular civilians here. You'll get three times as many fights and fiascoes, at the regular bars, than out there."

   "If you say so. Sure."

   "Good. This? Is Junior. Or, JG. He's regular FBI. He solved an attempted murder case here some years back, he's a great guy. There's another FBI guy comes in regular, he's not around this time. You might meet him eventually, if you stick around."

   Lou was quiet.

   "Okay."

   "Panic. You ever hear of pussy almost getting a guy killed before?"

   "Perish the thought, chief. Perish the thought."

   "Yeah. How's your little girlfriend doing, Lou."

   "I don't know…"

   "Hey. Not saying you two ain't gonna end up married, and raise little Missy's and Louie's, anything's possible. My money, though? Its on you got played. My advice is worth what you paid for it. Which is nothing, but… she ain't been here what, couple months? I ain't seen nothing out of her yet, but trouble. Hey. Maybe she has a real sweet side we ain't seen yet. Time will tell. I ain't the sex police, and you two ain't the first and as much as I'd like it to be the last fiasco? I ain't holding my breath. Its a little town, we tend to get little problems. Now. I get a bigger problem? I got people I can call. Like… Junior, or the other guy I mentioned. You catch more flies with sugar, Lou. All I'm saying. Hey. Here's the waitress…"

   Things went okay. The chief did what the chief's known for doing. Giving a glib explanation of the goings on to JG, who had trouble not chuckling into his coffee cup, what with the chief's usual smart ass sarcastic humorous way he went about most things with. Guy missed his calling, he could have been a comedian if he had put his mind to it. He did seem to be defusing the whole situation gently.

   After he sent Lou away after feeding him a big breakfast, he shrugged and explained if he was in a good mood, he'd find a few things for Lou to do, that would keep him out of trouble. Crosswalk duty at the little school was one he had in mind for him.

   One of my biker friends from down DC came in with another friendly face, and surprised me. Grizz and Buzzy. The grapevine travels news fast and bad news travels faster. No one was really happy with me being treated in such a fashion as I had been. Threatening property or members, was certainly not encouraged. To them? Its a challenge. I told them all, I thought it was best to let sleeping dogs lie, but its really not in my hands. After all? The biker's colors are on their own jackets, and its the same name on my property T shirts.

   They want people to know it, in no uncertain terms. You see a jacket? It says Pagans MC? You don't fuck with the person wearing it. Especially if they aren't fucking with you. Its their brand, its their reputation. Some girl wears a T shirt that has the brand on it? Same story there. Someone hands out a bumper sticker, or one of the little decals to put on your bike tank, that's it.

   Honestly, no different than cops. You put your hands on one cop? More will put their hands on you. You try to threaten or intimidate one of them or anything wearing their brand name? Really, about the same deal. So, apparently Grizz and Buzzy were authorized to put together a little bike show.

   A bike show is essentially a show of force. The word goes out quick. Anyone wants to have fun? We're having a bike show somewhere. There's two kinds of bike shows. The yes kind, and the no kind. The yes and no is a joke about the violence level. A yes bike show? We expect a little trouble, don't come and be shy about it. A no bike show? Its a secret, but… hands off unless it goes sour. Simple show of force, it creates the proper impression they want? Then… they leave.

   Out of my hands anyways. There's never any telling how many bikes will show up for a bike show. Most clubhouses know who Christmas is, and what her reputation and jacket shows. I'm the girl that killed thirteen dirty cops, and got the last three disabled and into custody. My "portal" personal web page? Has the little scratches and dashes that lets members tell at a glance that I've won club sanctioned beatings before. I was national property, and Pound was a respected national hands-on enforcer. I was left national property, then after the whole Dirty Dozen thing went down, well… its not widely held to be a wise maneuver to threaten national property. Hence? The bike show scheduled.

   I've gone on bike show runs with Pound before. I know how it will go. A shit load of big, loud bikes are going to coordinate outside the area and group up. The closer they get, the more groups coming in will pack up. Its a simple numbers game, its the biker version of a military parade. You're showing numbers and coordination. The message is unspoken but clear. If we want to, if we think we need to? We can quickly assemble a shitload of soldiers, and meet up and show it off. Grizz and Buzzy got a number of the boys to come in from DC, that was my original stomping grounds and Pound's home club as well. There's several other clubhouses not too far from the DC one. Its considered a fun weekend, guys going call friends and they each get a few more to go. These things can ramp up and get big.

   The girlfriends and normal skanks don't generally go. Its a guys only thing. The only girls you'll tend to see, are tanks. Girls with their own reputation for TCB, Taking Care of Business. Some of those, will be on their own big loud bikes, others were like I used to go with Pound. I'll probably ride on the back of Grizz or Buzzy's bike.

   The boys will meet at the local clubhouse, which in this case is our turf bar. Ground rules will be handed out and passed around. I know these off by heart. This is a no bike show, show of force only. Everyone will be instructed to be extra polite and all smiling faces, to everyone they meet in and around the target town, which is of course now Wrightsville. The boys will politely stop in the distributor, and pick up beer. They'll go places and line up and buy food. They'll tip well.

   Asked why they're here? Oh. No reason. Just wanted to come meet friends, have a a beer and share a few laughs. Everyone will put their happy faces on. Let any curious locals snap pictures of them on their bikes. A lot of the scariest looking guys will high five young kids and let them sit on the big bike and rev it for them. On big rides to little towns like this? They'll most likely do traffic control. Two guys will pause at any intersection, and hold their hands up and stop traffic to let the big, slow train of extra loud bikes riding in close formation pass through in one fell swoop. Red lights and stop signs are handled in the same fashion.

   Just about everyone, will be surprised. No broken windows, no drunken fistfights. Doors get held open for little old ladies and old men. Its a PR stunt as much as a show of force. Normal citizens? Should have nothing to fear from them. Of course, Lou and his little girlfriend? They'll end up parking somewhere and just sitting around, in their signature poses. Dark sunglasses, flying colors. Lots of big guys with big arms, game faces on. Yeah, somewhere near the object of their show.

   They'll probably ride rings around the place where either of them live, though not actually doing anything. Its just a show of force, its just a warning. If you were stupid enough to not take the hint? Its clearly the last warning you'd ever get. The biggest bike show I've ever been with Pound on? It was a show of force to the Hell's Angels. It was planned for over a month, and hundreds of them coordinated and rode around a small town they shouldn't have had a clubhouse in.

   Its no secret the Pagans and the Hell's Angels don't get along at all.

   I'm sure all the guys on this bike show will be instructed to be polite and wave to any cops they see, provided they aren't Lou. Bar owners, any place that sells food? They'll make a killing off all these guys. On a bike show run, in a small town like this one? The boys will do a crawl and hit every bar. In force. Probably buy pitchers of beer for everyone, and put happy faces on. Its PR mixed in with a show of force.

   They aren't really doing anything illegal? But… it in general almost always has the intended effect. The bikes will all group up around the turf bar, and tons of guys will pitch little pup tents and hang out all night, then take off when they're sobered up the next day and split up and take off in all directions. That way, if any state police were alerted and waiting outside the area? All they can do is pull over a few small groups, most of them get home unmolested. Whatever weed or coke that they had on them? They go through it partying, and as long as they sober up before the ride home, and don't have any illegal weapons on them? Really nothing any cop can do, but hassle them and let them go.

   Panic just shook his head, but found the whole idea… amusing, I guess. The boys all like him in general. After all. He was staying over when a dirty FBI agent came to sneak into my DC motel apartment, to assassinate me for being a witness. They didn't count on Panic staying over, and had no idea what they were in for. He plugged him 14 times. That's my "old man", and its considered quite prestigious in their biker world to get to shoot a cop let alone a dirty one, let alone a dirty fed… and get away with it. The fact he was protecting their "national property" was just icing on the cake.

   We thought about telling the chief, but… we didn't really know how to tell him. Its out of my hands anyways, not like I can call it off. Its not my decision. No one should die anyways, and like Mike would say. A few diapers had to get changed, but nothing serious.

   A couple of nationals ended up thinking it sounded like a fun weekend, and put the word out that a bike show is always a fun thing anyways. Philadelphia is hometown for the nationals, and really isn't that far away. Wrightsville is more or less smack dab in the center of the state, and Pennsylvania is their state, hands down. You don't fly one percent patches in PA, without the little diamond P logo patch on it.

   Which means that a lot of the littler "farm team" outlaw clubs? Like to impress the "major" team, of their support. A few packs of farm clubs decided to join in, simply because once a couple of nationals publicly express interest in going? Well, its considered quite prestigious to get to ride in formation with any nationals.

   Rides are fairly well regulated, if colors are flying. Nationals always ride out in the front. Any farm club members flying the diamond P logo? Have to bring up the rear. There was once an argument, over which farm club was directly behind them in formation. To prevent further infighting? Another regulation. Farm clubs are at the rear of the formation, but they will go back in alphabetical order. Naturally club members are behind the nationals and before the farm rears.

   There's a designated order to any of these groupings within their own group. You assemble formation by rank. President and Vice President of any chapter? Ride in front of their group. Other officers take ranking back, followed by regular members. Its highly regimented. Also, the boys ride in a fairly tight formation. Always two by two, a certain distance between bikes. Its conducted with almost military precision. New members prospecting? Go on a bunch of rides, so by the time they get their own colors, they can be trusted to ride in tight formation and not crash twenty other bikes and get everyone killed.

   Hand signals are watched and "repeated" back. Slow down, speed up, next left, next right. When to pass, etc. This is when flying colors. When not flying colors? You can ride in formation, or not as you all see fit. Unless, there is a "no colors" alert out. Certain states, are designated no colors states. If we're on bad diplomatic footing with another MC gang's state or city area? There's a strict no colors rule in effect. State or even nationwide no color warnings go out infrequently.

   For instance, say something big happened. Maybe a big violent incident occurred somewhere. State police are all looking to pull over all members for general purposes to try to flex their cop muscle. No color alert goes out. You honestly can't tell an outlaw MC gang from a regular social gang, without colors flying. Also? The formation when in color, tells everyone that knows, simply by watching. Who the President and Vice president are, they're in front. We spent almost two years under a no color ban once, and it was national and strictly enforced. That was back before my time, when the national president at that time was arrested and charged with a laundry list.

   If they want you to notice them that they're around, and to notice the size of the formations and see the numbers? Colors and formation. If they don't want you to notice them at all? Its like they're invisible. A national or a state no color ban usually comes with a formation limit. IE, only so many can ride in one big pack. Break up so no one notices. An... NC One mile six alert goes out for Pennsylvania? Easily understood. No colors, anywhere in Pennsylvania, until further notice. No more than six bikes to any riding. One mile distance minimum, between sub-packs traveling together.

   All of this is strictly regulated, and very strictly enforced. If you decide to ride flying colors through a Hell's Angels state? You can inadvertently set off a big situation. They might take it as an offense, and either hurt or even kill you for it. Now there's a huge problem. Since you were attacked while flying colors? It looks bad to not respond. There's a strict hierarchy, and the nationals sit at the top of that hierarchy. They make those command decisions.

   If you violate these strict rules? The least you get is a black eye or a punch in the mouth.

   Panic's been teasing me, that I'll be doing my Helen Keller routine. As in, sign language. Not a joke he'd make around the boys, that's for me personally. We have various hand signals we all communicate with. I read them all and more importantly pick up and notice them. Naturally I can do stuff back. Its called flashing. I did it a lot more when I was with Pound, my national enforcer boyfriend a ways back. I do it a lot less since. But with a bike show scheduled? Its naturally a thing.

   Its nothing anyone would notice if they weren't in the know. Its meant not to be noticed.

   It started around 8:00 am, Saturday morning. I heard a few little packs of extra loud straight pipes around town. Its a tiny one horse town, and the bank's more or less in the middle of town. The locals were out first, and all the bikes were in front of and around the bank. Grizz and Buzzy were with them, and me and Panic went and got on the backs of their bikes. The boys split up into two main packs, to go off and meet others that had already grouped up and were ready to pour in.

   It was a fairly big bike show, once the nationals got the extra attention and the farm clubs pitched in. Pittsburgh and south of Pittsburgh in particular, has a lot of little clubhouses around. So, more came in and a few smaller farm clubs from out that way too. I quickly lost count, to tell you the truth. Other smaller packs came in throughout the day and joined in.

   After a giant ride around town, stopping traffic at intersections and everything, they all started hitting places. Bars, food places, the grocery store. All smiling friendly faces, they do their PR work and follow instructions to the letter. The diner, the doughnut shop… everywhere the public goes. Me and Panic stopped in the doughnut shop, and the chief just gave me and Panic… the look.

   "Merry. Panic. What the hell…"

   Panic pointed at me, I was wearing one of my Property T shirts. I mean go figure.

   "Hey, chief. Its, uh… well? Its a… bike show."

   "Yeah. I can see that. Hell, if I was blind? I can fucking hear it. What's going on. Please come here, would you? Just give me a couple seconds…"

   I followed him into the back of the doughnut shop.

   "Is there going to be… a problem."

   "Shouldn't be. Its just a bike show."

   "Yeah. What, does a bike show, pray tell… entail. Hmm?"

   "Bunch of bikes. You ride around. Its a PR thing, too. Be friendly to all the locals. Hold doors for little old ladies. Tip good anywhere you go."

   The chief sighed.

   "Yeah, yeah. I think I got the picture. You have any idea, how bad my poor little cell phone is ringing off the hook?"

   "I mean, until you just told me…"

   The chief sighed again. His cell beeped while talking to me just now.

   "Steve?"

   "Yeah, chief."

   "You got any problems yet."

   "I mean, not really. I got a million cell calls and texts."

   "No, no. I got that much… I mean, you have any… incidents yet?"

   "Nope. Not a one, chief. You, uh… got any special instructions?"

   "No--- wait. I got a special job for you. You. Personally. You, go and get numb-nuts. Get there first, go now. I want him in the back, no. Stick his ass? In the trunk. I don't want anyone to see him. Get his ass into the station, and he's not to so much as peek out the window. He stays in the station, until further notice."

   "Okay. Uh, Chief?"

   "Yeah, Steve. What is it."

   "Two things."

   "Go. Time is of the essence, Steve. What."

   "Define… numb-nuts."

   "Steve? Having a new part timer? Can be a lot like having a little kid. Go. Get Louie. Immediately. His ass? Stays inside the station, doors locked, he doesn't peek out the windows. Until I say so."

   "Chief?"

   "Yeah, Steve."

   "You were kidding about the trunk, right?"

   "Fuck no! We're hiding his dumb ass, until this blows over."

   "Is he under arrest, or…"

   "No. I'm gonna file this under… protective custody. Get moving. Once you got him secure? Go get that stupid cunt, and you lock her ass up in the station too."

   "I'm guessing you mean---"

   "Oh yeah, I don't care if you need to put handcuffs on the two of them, I want both of those lovebirds locked up until this thing ends."

   "Uh, when does this end, chief? I mean, they might want a time frame. And, she's a civilian and all."

   "Take a guy or two with you, and get it done. Hold on, I got an expert who can probably tell me how long this lasts. Stay on the line…"

   "Merry? When does the bike show end."

   "Mm. All day, all night. It'll wind up out at the biker bar, naturally. The boys will mostly camp out, they'll sober up and sleep in… it'll break up tomorrow sometime."

   "Steve? You can tell them to pack what they need, for a 36 to 48 hour period of protective custody. You confiscate their cell phones. We clear? We'll get them food and take turns staying with them."

   "Okay chief. Any… instructions for after that?"

   "If you got any ideas, Steve. I mean, this is a new one on me."

   "Should… we call someone?"

   "Oh. You mean, like the other towns? Call an all hands on deck call."

   "Yeah."

   "I'm gonna say no. Not unless you get a real incident."

   "Chief? By that time, it would be too late."

   "Steve? We got one car. We got a couple guys we can have walk around in uniform. The hell's the difference if I got my usual one day guy, or four? I mean, seriously. We can call three or four little towns nearby, maybe get ten guys together. Again. If push came to shove? No. Now, on the other hand? Calling extra guys, makes us look bad. We look like we're clearly scared."

   "Chief. Am I in trouble for saying it, this is kinda one of those pucker moments."

   "Steve? I'm winging it. If there was going to be real trouble? Probably would already know about it. My advice, is just act like its no big deal. Do what you normally do. Walk around. Smile, wave, be friendly. Like that."

   "Okay. So… no all hands from the towns, no calling the barracks."

   "If anything serious actually happens? We go that route. But… I don't wanna escalate it. I don't want a dozen cops walking around, in a group, all puckered up. Its… a recipe for disaster. The state police? I don't want this escalated, and that's what they might do. Honestly? My best guess… this is just a polite show of force. I mean, technically? Its not illegal to ride around on loud bikes. If they don't really do anything? Why start trouble then we look bad."

   "I see your point there. I'm calling the off duty guys, just our own guys… tell them to walk around in plain clothes. I'll smile and wave at all the pretty bikes. You okay that plan?"

   "Yeah. Right after you go get those two geniuses, and keep them under lock and key. You get someone to keep them there, then call me if you hear anything sounds like an actual incident."

   "What are you gonna do, chief."

   "Normal day. After I'm done here? My normal routine, is to hit the diner. I'll be damned if I'm gonna alter my routine without something happening."

   "Will do, chief."

   "Over and out. Get Frick and Frack in custody, on ice. Then… meet me for breakfast if you feel like it, if nothing's kicking. Its a normal day. Unless."

   "I'll call you shortly."

   On the way out from the back of the doughnut shop from the little pow wow, I casually dropped it to the chief.

   "Chief? You won't take it personal, if me and Panic don't sit with you at the diner, right?"

   He chuckled.

   "No. Go have fun with your friends. Not too much fun, but, you kids have fun."

   For me and Panic? Basically just a long, fun spring day. Someone had ordered me a birthday cake. It had a cute cartoon pig, with two X's for eyes. And a big number 13 on it. They brought that to the one bar we hit, they crowded the place and the bar owner did a landmark business. Several of the guys casually pointed out the significance of the way the cake was decorated, just to see the faces on the guys he related it to.

   They split up into big groups. They crowded every bar, the diner, the doughnut shop, simply everywhere. They rode around in packs on the streets, waving and smiling to everyone. Little things, though. Anywhere they went, everyone casually dropped that they were looking for two of their "friends" that they couldn't wait to meet. Showing pictures of Lou and his new girlfriend around.

   Anywhere they went? They had a habit of asking everyone, if there were any really good BBQ places around. Because nothing really hit the spot after a few beers? Like dead, roasted pig.

   Its as much a PR event, as anything else though. All smiling faces. More than a few kids and teenagers got pictures taken sitting on big, custom bikes. Anything female that wanted a picture on or around the bikes got their picture. Packs of little giggling teenage girls were taking turns getting cell pictures and little videos to post online, naturally sneaking around so their parents didn't catch them doing it, but it looked like they were all doing it anyways. Young boys, too.

   There was even comedy relief. I mean, there's this one old lady… and she's a real pistol. The chief himself says good morning, ma'am? She'll screw her prune face up and tell him to go fuck himself. Its her thing, she's a local fixture. When she yelled at a couple to get the hell out of her way in line at the diner? Everyone looked to see what would happen. The boys cracked up and couldn't stop laughing. It was the funniest thing ever to them. The old lady followed it up, by flipping this huge guy off. They moved out of the way, and waved her up to the cash register to get her bran muffin and coffee to go.

   She cussed them soundly the whole way out the door, then everyone cracked up as she left.

   After the bike show was over, within a few days it was nothing but gossip and fallout. The chief had glib humor at Lou's expense, naturally, and no small amount of it was directed at his girlfriend as well. An example was when the chief had both of them out for diner ritual breakfast.

   In the course of going through breakfast he had ordered for them, he casually asked both at once.

   "Do you two see what all went on, because of the brilliant idea you both had? I mean, Louie. Please, from now on. Remember I'm the one that told you. Try to think with the bigger head, not the littler one, you know? And you. Missy. Do you even give a flying fuck, at all the shit that could have went down? I mean, you can't even give me a good reason for all this shit. If I could just get some kind of… a goddamn reason out of you? I could maybe appreciate this a little more."

   Nothing. Its the chief though, he'll go on once he's on a roll.

   "I mean, its got to be something, damn it. You… have some mental condition, you're pathologically afraid of girls that their name starts with the letter M? Your branch of the church you were raised in, taught you that people who are exactly six feet tall, are evil? What. Give me… something. She… cut you off driving… she cut in front of you at the line in the grocery store. Anything at all? Christ."

   Chief waited a little more.

   "So. This town could have looked like it went through a can opener, people could have maybe gotten killed and thank god no one and nothing got hurt, but… you just picked some girl out. In a town you just moved into, and decided. Huh. You know what? I'm gonna find some big girl, and just start giving her shit. Why? Cause that's what I do. For fun. Then, when it doesn't go good. I mean, why wouldn't anyone enjoy getting shit on… when they don't like it, you… just go and figure what the hell, I'll get some young cop, bat my eyes at him, let him start hell for nothing. Why? Why not."

   His after breakfast coffee's were another period of amusement.

   "You… ever been diagnosed with… issues… medication… anything like that?"

   He got dagger looks and nothing else.

   "I'm not a professional with that stuff, but… you know. Might wanna look into something like that. Just saying."

   "Missy, you don't have any other little… projects… like this one planned, do you? Cause don't take it personal, but I'm gonna keep my eye on you for a while now. Don't take offense. I mean, I don't know your history. Do you, pull shit like this all the time, or… was this just a one time fun thing."

   "Of course, you two might be amazed to learn, this actually wasn't the record for… biggest fiasco that ever happened over two people fucking before. Honestly. We had a, kind of an all out brawl, at a late night diner once. Christ, that was a mess. Everyone was drinking, married couples met up, with each other's spouses… whole thing went to hell."

   "Well? I'm gonna go. You two, try to stay out of trouble. And Missy? I can't order anyone to stay or leave town, just not within my powers. But, if you… you know… wanted to leave? I could, you know, take up a collection. Gas money… first class ticket to somewhere you'd wanna go to. Just, let me know if I can be of any help that way. Man, I'll sell tickets door to door, to fund you leaving in style, if that's what it'll take."

   As the chief was walking out the diner, he was heard muttering under his breath.

   "Christ. No wonder, no one wanted this job. The hell was I even thinking…"

   I'm pretty sure those two broke up shortly thereafter. Never saw them together again, but like I'd really know anyways. Panic started putting up his cameras JG got him and coached him on, I went and helped him locate them. Him and JG went on a run one night, and got a GPS tracker on the guy's vehicle. Within a couple weeks, he had information starting to trickle in but steadily. He kept going over things, trying to come up with something good.

   Over the same couple weeks, the Chief finally got Lou back "in the field". Sort of, anyways. He had him at the diner. The chief conducted a lot of police business out in the open, he always did say he wanted less secrets from the town what the hell was going on in the police force, anyways. Transparency, he called it.

   "All right, Lou. We're gonna try it out again. Real… slow. Now. There's an old lady, 65 or so. She's taking a vacation. Crossing guard at the grade school. You get a stop sign, a whistle, and… one of those reflective things to wear. When little kids cross the street? You blow the whistle, you stop traffic. Look both ways, cause they're little kids they don't always look both ways, you do it for them. And? You walk the little kiddies across the street. In the crosswalk. I'd say you can't fuck this up, but… clearly, anything's possible."

   "All right, chief."

   "Now. Here's the school schedule. Make sure you're there early. Then, there's lunch out and back in. Then… be there early for school getting out. Be nice to all the parents you meet. Now. Keep this in mind. They call us cops, true. But? They also, put us in the broad category of… public… servants. We… protect, and serve? The public. You work? For the people in town. You're there? To help them. Not, the other way around, okay?"

   "Sure."

   "Oh. And one more thing. Your little girlfriend? I don't want her within a hundred yards, of the school. For opening, for lunch, for closing time. She's not allowed to so much as bring you a bag lunch. Now. You'll probably wonder, what you should be doing, when you're not doing the crossing guard thing for those two weeks. Glad you were just about to ask. You don't need your gun or your uniform, but… wear your cop cam. I want you to just… walk around. You see an old lady? Help her across the street. You see some old man carrying groceries? Try to help him, see if he'll let you carry a bag of groceries. Be nice to everyone. You see someone with a flat tire? Offer to change the tire for them. I want you to get used, to just… trying to be helpful. You'll do more good that way, than… anything else for now. Just… let people see you having a great day, and… like that. If you even think you see something? Just don't. You got your cell on you? Call whoever is on duty. You give me two solid weeks, with nothing going to hell and back? We'll see about getting you back out with Steve again, see about getting some of your probation time back off, maybe. Okay?"

   "Yeah."

   The chief actually watches over the town like a hawk, and takes an inordinate interest in having good relations between his little force, and the public at large he's responsible to ride herd over. The chief was watching over his little town. I was actually doing my job no one knows about, watching over the outlaw biker gang it was my job to keep tabs on. Panic? Was watching, well… you know what he was watching. Hell, Louie? Was mainly watching over little kids crossing the street back and forth to the grade-school.

   Everyone, was just watching something, it seemed like.