Beginning - Chapter 7

   "What you thinking, Panic? You got that daydreaming look. Good old Speedy has been around Panic long enough to know you're probably on your 'chew the cud' plan."

   "Well, when we get the theory 'perfect' or whatever passes for it? It explains everything. I have two things that keep popping back into my head."

   "Anything concrete?"

   "No. Just hunches…"

   "Hunches I like. I work on hunches. A good gut feeling, a good hunch… points you in the right direction. Where you can find something. What's your two hunches?"

   "Well, one is the smiley killer grave marker message. Its kind of infamous in the smiley case lore on the internet."

   "What's the message?"

   "Well… some time after the case 'broke' so to speak… people started talking about it. Arguing it did or didn't exist… there were less canon victims. Someone left a message on a gravestone of one of the college kids everyone thought was a smiley victim."

   "Almost afraid to ask what the message was, but…"

   "The message said 'You can't find what you aren't looking for', and people argued about it. One school of thought was that some wise-ass put it there. Another school of thought? Was that someone that knew something left it there. Maybe as a taunt, like a serial killer sending letters to the parents. Now, I'm thinking of another possibility…"

   "What's that?"

   "Well. Let's say we are on the right track. We're tracking a ring of renegade Gypsy bitcoin thieves. Everyone else, has always called it the 'smiley case killer'. Looking at it from our new point of view? Everyone has always been looking for a serial killer or killers. The message, if we are right about anything? Is then surprisingly correct."

   "Well, what's your new possibility?"

   "It could be an obvious taunt. A brag. From someone on the inside. But, it could also be… a person with remorse. They visit the grave one night, drink a few beers, leave the message. They can't do anything about it? But, they have some remorse."

   "How could this get us anywhere?"

   "Remote possibility? I was thinking a gypsy… committed suicide. It would probably be when they were down south or on down time. Or? Tried to get out of it, they couldn't handle it… and they were… cut from the team, so to speak."

   "Managing hunches on odds of things? I don't give this a high priority."

   "I understand. Just food for thought. Like I said, if we are right… the message now makes a lot more sense. When the theory is correct, it explains everything."

   "What was point number two?"

   "There is… one weird case, and by luck it happened right up in the city of Pittsburgh, north of us. People argue if it's even a smiley case or not."

   "How did it go?"

   "Some young guy. Not a college student. Upper middle class parents though. All the canon smiley victims, seem to all be straight… this guy was known to close friends to be gay."

   "Go on…"

   "Well. He's acting weird on the phone. Calling friends for a ride, he's scared. Says people are following him. Dark SUVs. They said it wasn't like him, he sounded genuinely terrified. They also said that as the calls went on, he couldn't tell them where he was. He was scared, but, their impression was that he was slightly 'out of it'. Confused. Could not explain exactly where he was for them to come and get him. The calls come in periodically."

   "What happened?"

   "Friends went looking for him. One call by chance, he's disoriented and mumbling, mentions a business name. The friends head for all the locations of that business they can find. One of them hits pay dirt, a girl, and her and the guy she's with grab him and get him in the car. This is where it gets weirder."

   "Go on…"

   "The friends? Were not disoriented, they claimed there were 'several' dark SUVs running around the nearby blocks, and they got followed for a while. They kept him laying down in the back seat, and eventually they either got away, or, the SUVs backed off. No plates or concrete vehicle descriptions, but, those two friends that found him? Said all they knew was that there were several big, dark, SUVs… with what they said looked like 'foreigners' driving and in the vehicles as passengers."

   "Hm. It sounds like the SUVs were doing what cops do. We run grids up and down streets in the area we're looking for something in. Usually a car or a perpetrator on foot."

   "The description of the foreigners driving dark SUVs? All they could describe was that they all looked 'similar', and that they all looked to be… 'slightly Arabic' or 'eastern European' or 'Mediterranean'. Dark swarthy skin and hair and eyes. The sober witnesses said they were all obviously looking for something, they were all heads swiveling around, eyeing people up, pointing up alleys and shit like that."

   "How is this a smiley tie in?"

   "Oh. Same guy? He's in shock. Friends take him home, calm him down. He sleeps for two days. Third day, he's feeling better enough he goes off. Couple days later? He mysteriously drowns in the south side. With nice clothes on."

   "Weird…"

   "Yeah. He's disoriented, claims he was chased and held captive. That he woke up in some room somewhere, and walked out and got away."

   "They aren't very good at holding a young man captive, but, I see where you're going… it sounds like they kept him drugged. I guess if you dosed someone, you plop them in a room on a couch or a bed… if they unexpectedly woke up, I guess they could get away. Particularly if the people were not used to holding people captive, that's the only way I could see someone making a schoolboy error like that."

   "Speedy… can I ask you a stupid question?"

   "Sure…"

   "What exactly does a gypsy even look like? What words would people use to describe several of them if they didn't already know what to call them?"

   "Oh, I already knew where you were going with the descriptions. Different people use different words to describe who scammed them on the driveway or roofing sealer jobs, or, what the people who did a distraction theft in general looked like. Pretty much what that description was, although to be fair, it could have been any of several other races. That said? It fits with our theory, I'll give you that."

   "How can all the other canon victims be straight men, and this one man is known to close friends to be gay and go to gay clubs. It sticks out out like a sore thumb to me. Is my hunch valid, you suppose?"

   Speedy wagged his head slowly. Contemplating, juggling odds by gut.

   "Yeah. I'll see your hunch, and raise you that I'm curious. You gave me enough rough info that if I ask the police about it in Pittsburgh, I should be able to find someone remembers the case. Now with a fresh idea, maybe there's someone left to interview. I'd like to interview the friends that tried to help. Ask people to tell us all they know about him. Like anything else you try, it might be nothing, it might be something. You never know. Like I said, I'll see what I can do. I know if my friend was dead that I found and saved… I'd talk to about anyone that said he was trying to help. Shouldn't be too hard to dredge something up."

   Panic added the disclaimer, likely on account of him always carping about cops previously.

   "I can understand the police couldn't do much, they had nothing to go on. Can't very well go around handcuffing all the foreigners with swarthy skin in Pittsburgh, there's a healthy mix of foreigners there."

   Speedy added ominously.

   "There's always a bunch of foreigners in the cities. There's always a bunch of foreigners on and around any university campus as well. I'm noticing a trend…"

   Panic sighed…

   "After this case? I'm going to turn into a xenophobe… I never used to be. I always liked the novelty about asking people about their far away homeland, what its like there. It's… interesting.

   "Gypsies can… pass themselves off as a lot of other things, Panic. If we're right, I'm guessing that colleges and cities are two of the best places for them to sort of 'blend in' and just be another dark haired dark eyed foreigner with a decent tan."

   "What are we looking for? How in the hell are we supposed to pick gypsies out of a room full of people. Like in a bar setting, which is what I'm figuring is prime hunting grounds."

   Speedy thought about it.

   "Dark hair, dark eyes, somewhat of a tan. In the summer, they get as dark or darker than Italians if they're in the sun, like the roofing and driveway scam crews. In winter, it would register as a 'mild tan'."

   "Most of the ones I ever met, have a very slight accent. Most of them don't come from other countries, but, there's a slight accent most of them have. I'm pretty sure they just pick it up in childhood."

   "The men? Like all men they can run the gamut on height and weight, but, a lot of the men tend to be a little on the short side, but, big arms and legs, barrel chested. A lot of the men have slightly curly hair. Not black people hair, just… a little curly."

   "The women? Most of them have a sort of slightly exotic look to an American, as least most guys think so. The teeny accent doesn't hurt any. They just… look… middle eastern or eastern European, most people say."

   "Some of the women are shorter and curvier, some of them are taller and skinnier. As a cop? If we don't pick them up because they're still in the area after a couple of roofing and driveway scams… cops will usually encounter them when they're traveling."

   "It's common when they're on the move, to see several or more traveling in a van, a truck with a trailer camper, like that. You pull them over? They smile a lot. Act friendly. Pretty rare to find them drinking and driving or any contraband or weapons in the vehicles. Usually nothing except food, drink, blankets, tents… and a wad of cash. Story is always the same, we're driving to a work site. We're driving back from a work site. Any business card? Just a cell number and a fake business name. Joe's Roof and Driveway Sealing Company."

   "So, most of them live down south for the winter, and they drive up here for the spring summer fall scam season… what's the garden variety driveway roofing scam? How's that go?"

   "Oh. That's their trademark scam. Friendly 'contractor' drives up and down all the back roads. Looking for long asphalt driveways, and old style metal roofs. Very polite, Very friendly, good to excellent at chit chat and glad handing the customers. Like a friendly car salesman. They talk about 'hard work' and 'work ethic' and 'how important family is'… because that's what homeowners like to hear."

   "Both scams are basically the same. It takes no real expertise to brush tar down a driveway, or, down a old style metal roof. Barns are a favorite target. Look, you mix diesel in with the roofing or driveway tar. That's normal to thin it, but… they go nuts with the diesel."

   "It looks fine. It smells fine. They put on a real show, friendly and working like dogs in the sun. Happy to be at your service, too. One will run and get your wife's groceries with a smile. But… they can bid the job so low, because they're really skimping bad on the real tar product, which is expensive."

   "See, you never think anything is wrong, but, in a few weeks and a few rains? The thinned out roofing tar starts to peel off as all the diesel evaporates, and the thin film that rides the top? Flakes off. Driveway? Same deal."

   "The friendly leader guy, lines up a bunch of jobs. They love to show off their work, freshly done, to the neighbors… they can turn one job into three or six. All cash business, they work the season and split back down south. That's the typical life of a gypsy."

   "You won't typically get one to rat on another. They run in family and close friends groups. You don't shit where you eat, they don't run any scams down south for the winter. They tend to have several families own a big patch of undeveloped land, they all stick cheap trailers on it for the winter down south."

   "The guy that owns that big patch of land they all stay on? He's the 'king' to them. They actually call him the king privately. He directs the scams and the family groups under his care. He's like… the chief."

   "After all the years of their signature traveling 'contractor' driveway/roofing scam… they more recently branched out… what we call 'distraction thefts'. Some pretext to talk to the person in the house, while one or two look to sneak in and steal purse, jewelry, quick carry off items. If they get caught? Smile a lot. Polite. Friendly. Tend to skip bail, but, its not a high enough level crime for anything but a low level warrant. Most won't carry any ID unless driving and they have to."

   "That king? He owns the trailers on his land, and the vehicles they all drive. He seeds them with traveling and food money. The groups are responsible to 'earn' and bring back a lump of cash at the end of the season and turn it over faithfully. If you're good enough an earner? You sometimes branch off and start your own crew. They tend to marry within their own race. Very clannish. They tend to stick to themselves, at all times."

   "Now, there's always some scam to them. At all times. If the leader is in the local bar? He's really scouting up business. Another trademark scam? Always at gas stations and truck stops, they have this gold watch or gold chain, or a decent looking fake gemstone, that they need to sell the family heirloom that's expensive to get gas money to get back home for a family emergency… it's truck stop jewelry with a good story. They try to sell fake jewelry like that in bars, drunk guys get scammed easier, I guess."

   "The other jewelry scam, is the guy goes to boo hoo at the small town bar. I got this expensive ring, my fiance shit on me… why, fuck her, I'd just as soon sell this five thousand dollar rock, for… a grand, and get piss drunk. Why, that'll show her… and yeah, you'd be surprised how many drunk rednecks think they're taking advantage of the poor drunk guy got dumped. And hey, cubic zirconia? If you're not a good gemologist, well… hard to spot the difference. The scam works better, when the girl at the bar with him? Suddenly freaks out, screams and argues… yells… fuck you, asshole. Here, you can have your stupid five thousand dollar ring back. Fuck you, we're through. Then? Later on… he'll sell it for nothing, just to spite her. They're… slick, I tell you. Always, always… a scam."

   "Cheap clothes, cheap food, cheap lodging or camping. Cheap tools. The scam season is more or less a business. The one trademark? It's a scam, and, you fall for it trying to save money. Based on my experience with them as a state cop? My wild ass guess… would be the girls doing this? Would look better than normal for that price."

   "Didn't I see gypsies on some TV show, or, web episode?"

   "Yeah… couple years back? Rich gypsy families had a show that was about their weddings. Pretty, exotic looking girls getting married… with famously big, glitzy weddings. They tend to wear outlandish wedding dresses, show skin. I'm starting to wonder if those rich Gypsy families? If some of them didn't get rich from hoarding all the bitcoins over the years, and they skyrocketed in value."

   "You mean to tell me, America has gotten such bad values, that we have a TV show based on rich successful criminals showing off their wealth?"

   "Hey. Fits right in with the crime family reality TV shows, you know."

   "Whats the real name for gypsies, Speedy?"

   "They're actually called 'Romani'… but, they aren't really Romanian. They don't have their own country, they work in host countries. If a country works out? They stay and breed. Big families are the order of the day. A successful gypsy male has a lot of sons and daughters, more labor, more scams. A few older women do the fortune teller gig for traveling carnivals. They head back south for the winter too. In their off season."

   "So, its a cultural thing."

   "Basically, yeah."

   "Other ethnic groups that come to America, they slowly assimilate, and turn into real Americans…"

   "Not the gypsies. They tend to stick to their own thing. Think 'chinatown', but, spread out and traveling."

   "Strange, Speedy. Strange…"

   "Hey, it's a strange world we live in, Panic. A very strange world."

   Speedy waited a few seconds, then left him alone.