Range - Chapter 38

   Panic bragged a little, like he had been told to. He first confided in Rob, who laughed and clapped him on the shoulder, and called Skykid over. Bragged for him to Skykid. Panic already knew beforehand that once he spilled the beans publicly like this, it was game on. His sex life became the next twenty minutes of humor, jokes, ribbing and guys trying to brag back. Which didn't bother him in the least. One guy called out to Rob…

   "Makes sense. You said they were still sleeping in at 10:00 am. Somebody was up late…"

   "I thought someone opened the door and left without waking us up."

   "Yeah. I knocked and no answer. I just poked my head in, and backed out. I didn't see anything. Not that I'd a minded getting a quick peep at her, but… I can't get that lucky. Couldn't even see her face, she looks like she sleeps with your neck in her teeth. She a vampire?"

   "She bites. A little…"

   Rob chuckled and Skykid readjusted his ever present sunglasses and laughed.

   Trans Am, screen named "Bandit" after his first trophy car, wanted to know what all the commotion was, he was just coming in with a few other guys off of one of the trails that snaked out from their clubhouse and main camp.

   Rob did his usual thing, and ran over and explained what the topic of conversation was that he had missed.

   Bandit chuckled as Rob quizzed him…

   "Your little blondie wife let you fight her for it like that?"

   "Rob? If you knew how much those hairdressers cost… I have to watch out for her hair."

   Rob kept it up.

   "Man. Now, hot oil wrestling, I heard of. Hot oil rape? That's a new one… at least, not without them running away crying. She crying ?"

   "Smiling. Wants her ass smacked next time."

   "Hear that? Next time… damn! I told you Panic, you're shitting in tall cotton. Now… you met the family yet?"

   "I know nothing, except she supposedly comes from Ohio. Some farm area turned into a 'giant yard' housing plan with woods around it…"

   "Right. This keeps up? You'll get to meet the family, eventually. Now… this is very important… you find a sister, a cousin… anything like that? I get first dibs. Or we're fighting…"

   "I make it to Ohio? I'll steal a sister or a cousin in a mail sack for you. I promise. I'm sure the family won't mind at all…"

   "Yep yep. That's what I wanna hear. All right now, let's plan this out. We get what we get with the movie, there's only one movie theater close enough to drive, and it only has two screens playing. We're in the sticks…"

   "Merry said she doesn't care what movie we see, she just wants dinner and a movie."

   Skykid smiled…

   "Wow. Your girl's easy. We were arguing which movie, for times…"

   Rob cut back in, still being witty.

   "Skykid. Weren't you listening? We already know she's easy. The important thing, is where we're gonna eat. Does she like seafood?"

   "She said she doesn't care where we eat, either. As long as we go in and sit in a seat. No take out."

   "Holy shit. She's easier than I thought."

   Rob smiled so his friend knew he was joking.

   "Now then, all that's left? Who's sitting where."

   Skykid piped up.

   "He has to sit with her, so I get shotgun, you overgrown Kraut."

   "I just don't know about them in the back seat. It's a little bit of driving. I don't wanna have to clean the upholstery. My girl won't believe I didn't make the love stains."

   Rob had been working on his comedy routine, obviously. Everyone chuckled.

   Everyone was starting to wish them well and to have fun on their night out, until someone wondered aloud who was going to handle dinner. Skykid was always the de facto main camp cook anytime he showed up.

   "For one dinner, you guys can make do with deer burgers, right? You guys know where the freezer in the barn is. The cook gets a night off tonight. We'll see you boys when we see you."

   Rob started looking at his cell to check the time…

   "How long do we have to wait on your rape victim? I wanna get going. Schedule."

   Skykid laughed…

   "Robbie… it's a night out, it's not a military raid. We don't have to plan and execute with ruthless German efficiency. We picked the crab place, and it's open till 2 am. We miss the first screen? We fall back on the second screen a half hour later. Jesus…"

   "There's no reason not to have a schedule, frog boy."

   "Well? How long do we have to wait for her to change clothes. She wears jeans and T shirts if she ain't dressed up like Pochahantas. Been almost 45 minutes. Can we go now?"

   Panic shrugged, then nodded. Skykid, flashed his right arm out. Nazi salute. Panic smiled, and decided not to bring up the Hitler's mustache. He had to save something for next time, he figured. He also wasn't 100 percent sure how Merry would take it, if some of the boys started giving her Nazi salutes. It wouldn't take a genius to figure it out, and Merry wasn't stupid.

   Loading up for the short drive out to their cabin, Rob asked if it would be funny if they just pulled up and the front seat was open, to hear her complain and to tease her a little bit. Panic said he didn't mind; Skykid jokingly reminded Rob that she would taser him if she didn't think it was a joke.

   They got in and drove off still talking about it, and Rob's last quip came out…

   "I'll risk it, German courage in battle is supposed to be legendary. Panic, you said she's Italian?"

   "She said little bit of Indian, lot of Italian."

   Still on world war two humor, Rob quipped.

   "The Italian trains didn't run on time, until the Germans took them over. We're probably gonna have to wait. While she picks out which pair of jeans to wear…"

   Going slow on the trail, Skykid spoke first as they came around the last bend slowly and the cabin area was visible up ahead as they slowly crawled over tree roots in the trail.

   "What, is that?"

   Rob peered over the steering wheel.

   "Panic? You have company? It looks like your Indian maiden brought a blind date for me and Sky to fight over…"

   "Rob, I think that's her…"

   Skykid glanced over at Panic, and Rob looked at him in the rear view mirror as he slowed down to enter the cabin camping area right on the trail they had turned up on to get there. Panic's only response…

   "Holy shit."

   "Skykid, no one told me it was black tie…"

   "Robbie, I'm wearing a camoflauge T shirt…"

   "Guys? Don't look at me, I didn't know I could afford one of those."

   They pulled up and stopped a few feet away from Merry. She was standing in the middle of the trail, waiting on them. Skykid coughed. Rob just waved. Panic didn't say a word.

   Merry was in a little black dress. It looked something like a black silk slip except that it had a sort of "belt" made out of the dress material that gathered it in at the waist, above her hips and below her breasts. Cut low enough the tops of her breasts were playing peekaboo. She didn't need a bra to have a decent chest figure.

   She had a little black drawstring pouch in one hand, swinging it gently. Her other hand posed on her hip, leaning her hip out and with her legs adjusted for that stance. She wasn't short, and had rather high heels on. Like the simple black dress, simple basic high heels. Her tan legs were muscular, and the really tall heels popped her calf muscles out and showed them off. Her leg muscles were feminine as well though. Curvy not skinny. She obviously had rounded hips and thighs, but her stomach was flat, and the material belt made sure you noticed.

   Just like the top of the dress was cut low enough her boob tops played peekaboo without a bra, her dress was cut high enough up her legs to show them all the way off. Any higher, she was a hooker. Any lower, she would be too proper. Just like showing off she didn't need any bra to keep her figure, there were no stockings to hide any skin imperfections.

   She upended her palms to ask silently "where you guys been?", and demonstrated she could walk fine in high heels, even on the rugged trail surface. The dress hem was as high as it could be and not be a hooker's uniform, and it wasn't an even cut. It was made to appear deliberately "ragged", and allowed more of her legs to show. Her thighs and calves flexed as she walked, sashaying one foot in front of the other to the hood of the car.

   She smiled and whirled around slowly, to let them see her. Posed back hand on her hip again, waiting. She was now close enough they could see everything about her outfit. Little gold charm bracelet loaded with various little charms on one wrist. A couple small gold bracelets on the other wrist. A small ring on either hand but different fingers for each. She still had on the leather braided anklets and bracelets as well. A little thin gold chain around one ankle, draping around and among the leather braid.

   That wasn't likely all the three of them were gawking at, though. Her hair was pulled up and back a little, exposing her tan neck and strong rounded shoulders. A choker necklace that was really a tennis bracelet of different colored stones, coupled with a longer thin gold chain, that ended in what looked like a ruby. Her birthstone.

   But that wasn't it. It was her face. They all three realized they had never once seen her with makeup on. With the eyelashes and eyeliner and lipstick and eye and cheek shadow all done? She looked like… she suddenly wanted to compete with the trophy wives.

   When they just all gawked at her, instead of getting her in the car, she upended her palms once again. Then leaned over the hood of Rob's car, putting her hands up on the hood. Held one palm up…

   "Are one of you going to put me in the car? Or do I ride in the trunk. Hmm?"

   Rob regained composure first.

   "Panic? Get out. Put her in the car. If you get her in the front seat? I'm buying drinks at dinner."

   Panic got out and walked up to her. She put her free hand not holding her little fabric bag that was made out of the same material as the dress and the belting… behind his head, and drew him in for a hug with her entire body up against him for a few seconds. Classic old movie styled one leg up in the air for the lengthened hug. He took her hand, and walked her to the front seat.

   "I get shotgun? Only if you allow me, hun."

   "Sure. We… figured you might wanna work the radio."

   "Uh huh. It's fine. I need leg room anyways, dear."

   Then she got in the front seat, and stretched her legs out and crossed them. Panic closed the door on her, and went and hopped back in the rear with Skykid. Rob just smiled at his passenger. Merry smiled back.

   "Little Robbie?"

   "Yes ma'am…"

   "If… you put the doohickey to point at the 'D', and press the foot thing on the right? The car goes forwards, dear."

   Rob didn't have much of a quip. Which wasn't like him.

   "Yep."

   He was still staring.

   Merry pouted and looked around…

   "What? Do I have a tick on me somewhere…"

   "Panic? Am I in trouble for looking?"

   Panic smiled. Skykid commented.

   "Robbie? She's going to taser you, if you don't drive the car. Just saying."

   Once the car was moving, they realized her perfume was filling the car up. Skykid complimented her on how good she smelled.

   "Honey… do I look okay?"

   "Just fine, hun. We just didn't know we were hitting a red carpet somewhere."

   "Well, I wanna be one of the pretty girls, wherever we're going. Geez… my jeans and hikers are fine for tromping around in the mud, but… we get to sit down for eating, right? You promised, honey…"

   "We will sit for dinner."

   Skykid chuckled…

   "If Little Robbie can keep his eyes on the road, that is, and manage to get us there in one piece…"

   "Oh, that. You're Panic's friends. You're allowed to look all you want. I just don't share, and I don't do couples."

   Rob finally got his trademark sarcastic humor voice back.

   "Yeah, we wouldn't want that now, would we."

   Skykid leaned over the back seat and jokingly smacked "Little Robbie" upside the head. "Down boy. Or you ride the lightning. Remember that."

   "Robbie? Do you mind, if I stretch out some? I just love little road trips. I wanna be comfortable…"

   "You can put the seat back if you want, Ma'am. I'm short."

   "Why thank you, Sky…"

   Merry leaned her seat back, and wiggled around to get comfortable. Smiled and angled herself just enough she could manage to get her feet up on the dash.

   "I hope you don't mind, Little Robbie… I haven't worn my heels for a while…"

   "No, no. Put your feet up. Play with the radio. Do whatever you want. My car's your car…"

   Panic and Skykid were exchanging looks in the back seat and giggling. Everyone knew, Rob was particular about his car. Another guy had joined him for the trip up here to work on the new range, and Rob had let the guy bring his car up for better gas mileage on the trip, leaving his high mileage low gas efficiency work truck at his house. Jokes went around from all the car rules Rob imposed on him driving his car. If he was driving, you had to talk about what radio station or CD with him, and you definitely didn't put your feet on the seats or anywhere else. Merry obviously was having fun showing off her magical ability to do anything she pleased.

   Merry changed the radio station anytime she felt like it. Panic just smiled when Rob glanced at him in the rear view mirror. Skykid couldn't stop chuckling.

   "I'm normally one of those girls that likes to hang her feet out the window on road trips? But… I think it would be a bit much, to have the wind blowing my dress up."

   Rob laughed.

   "No, have fun…"

   Skykid pointed at the road ahead of them on the busy highway they had finally hit upon.

   "Eyes on the road, Herr Robbie.."

   "Oui Oui, Frenchie…"

   "It's all right. I have underwear on, you know. I mean, what's the point of wearing a pretty dress, then have granny panties showing through the thin material, you know? I'm so glad someone invented G-strings. Problem? Solution."

   Panic finally busted out laughing, and Skykid went from giggles to laughing out loud as well. Even Rob chuckled.

   Merry put her feet down, and brought her seat up to a normal position, and bent over to ostensibly put her 5 inch fuck me pumps back on, though no one but "Little Robbie" knew what she was really doing.

   Merry was redoing the little ankle straps on her high heeled pumps when she quipped without looking…

   "Take a picture Rob, it'll last longer."

   Which made everyone laugh again.

   "Okay. I'm done having fun with you boys. Oh come on, you all acted like you never saw a girl in a dress before when you picked me up. I had to have a little fun. Little Robbie, can I smoke in here?"

   Panic and Skykid giggled again, no one was allowed to smoke in Rob's car, only the old work pickup he also had with him on account of how someone else borrowed his car coming up the coast.

   "Not a problem…"

   Merry produced an unfiltered cigarette, and lit up. Wiggled it to put the flame on the "cigarette" out. She offered it to Rob, who said "no" twice, then took it and passed it back to her.

   She held it back over her head to the back seat. Skykid amazed Panic, by actually taking one deep long draw and holding it in, before passing it over to his fellow back seat passenger.

   When Panic was done with several inhales, and passed it back up to Merry and Rob, Panic eyed Skykid. He was famous for admitting he had done it when young, but never did it "as an adult", as he claimed.

   "Don't tell my wife, she'll kill me. Special occasion, Frenchie gets to have someone else cook for him."

   Merry pinched it out when they were all turning it down and she was obviously done. She shrugged.

   "For the movie. We'll finish it before dinner…"

   When they hit the movie theater, it was a small town. Merry stayed in the front seat, until Panic remembered he was supposed to take her hand and get her out. Turned out that was what she was wiggling her fingers out the open door for. At 5'11" or more, with the added height of her 5 inch pumps and hair pulled up… she appeared taller than Panic at 6'1" or thereabouts. Even with his heeled work boots on, Merry was edging him out in apparent height. Her muscular legs had men staring at her walking around. Panic just grinned like a Cheshire cat and held her hand at every opportunity.

   The movie, and then dinner a short drive away at the crab place they had found on Rob's internet phone went uneventfully. Panic and his friends were now well used to seeing Merry in her get up, and everyone ignored men sneaking peeks at her tan legs.

   Rob was the only one at dinner conversation to bring up her appearance, other than regular compliments.

   "What's with the jewelry. We know you're a waitress, and you claim you don't fuck rich guys…"

   Panic and Skykid nearly spit food out chuckling nervously. Merry had been stuffing her face with crab meat, and licking her fingers as if she was still around the campfire. She smiled and didn't take offense.

   "Nothing is real, Rob. The gold? All truck stop jewelry. I'm lucky if it's even gold plated. The necklace? They're real gemstones, but, as long as it's not a diamond, and you don't require flawless? Doesn't cost me shit. The dress? It's not real silk. The pumps? Not designer. I can do my own makeup and hair at my age."

   Panic tried to save him.

   "Well, you still look like a 10, Merry. I'm pretty sure, there's a teenager over in the corner, trying to snap a picture of you on his phone…"

   She grabbed a crab leg out of the all you can eat bucket and cracked the leg with her firm grip, then sucked meat out and dug out the rest with the tiny fork in a decidedly non ladylike fashion.

   "And, this is called a 'little black dress', us girls call it. If you have any kind of figure? You can wear it without having it fitted. It's the girl version of being able to wear 'off the rack' suits, if you're in any kind of shape. Women with money will know my jewelry and dress and shoes are fakes, but… their men won't know, as long as they're straight. Believe it or not? My Indian shoes alone are worth ten times this whole get up… real Indian rendezvous clothes are not cheap. I only have that because my uncle bought it all for me over time as gifts when I was younger."

   Skykid chimed in…

   "Merry? If any men walk up to inspect your outfit closely? I don't think they're looking for designer labels…"

   Merry smiled.

   "Let them look. I didn't get all dolled up to not be noticed. Honestly guys, what do you think women get all dressed up for, to try to blend in? Ha. Panic had some kind of breakthrough on his case, he said. We decided to go out and celebrate. I just… thought he would enjoy seeing what his personal property looks like when it's put on display. I'm trying to make Panic look good, really, not myself."

   Rob smiled.

   "Well then… Panic? You look fucking gorgeous…"

   All three of them laughed. Merry continued…

   "Honey? I don't normally do this all the time. I hope you don't mind. I know you don't like girly girls. I hope it's okay."

   Panic smiled.

   "I have zero issues with this, Merry."

   "Oh. Good. I was a little worried… so… I don't have to change, before we go to bed tonight?"

   Rob almost choked on his crab meat, and Skykid practically spit his mouthful of drink out.

   Merry winked at Panic without anyone else seeing in between handfuls and mouthfuls of butter dripping from chunks of crab meat.

   "So, do you boys like the little braided leather bracelets and anklets? Are they cute?"

   Rob glanced at her wrist she held out, and Skykid glanced at her ankle she held out before retracting both.

   "Sure."

   "Yeah."

   Merry smiled.

   "Do you wanna know what they're for?"

   Panic now started choking on a piece of crab meat…

   "You all right, dear? Did something go down on you the wrong way? You okay?"

   "My uncle used to take me with his own kids, to rendezvous. I learned how to make my own 'Indian jewelry' in a class at rendezvous one summer. These are the bracelets and the anklets the Indian girls wear for jewelry. The men wear them too, they're just a lot thicker and stronger."

   Rob nodded while stuffing his gob…

   "No, they look nice…"

   "Panic? You want me to make you a set of them? The men's version uses a little bit thicker of leather cord. They're a little more 'macho' than these girly ones. Hmm? We can have matching jewelry, his and hers… what do you think?"

   "Uh, sure honey. Whatever you want."

   Merry smiled and winked at him.

   "Thanks. I didn't know if you'd wear them. Honestly boys, I wish I could just plop a collar around his neck, with my name and phone number on it, so other women know he's mine. I can't be the only girl out there, that's looking to jump on a nice guy like him. I worry."

   Panic wondered aloud…

   "Really?"

   "Duh. I'm trying to be nice, but, there's a lady at the donut shop when we stop in for coffee with the pigs in town late at night? I'm not sure Panic knows she likes him. Us girls know when another girl is pulling that shit, and I'd about like to strangle her, the way she carries on… oh, would you like another coffee, sir? Here… we have extra donuts, would you like one? They're fresh, we made too many. Oopsie!… fucking bitch…"

   Merry smiled to let them know she was only irked and not really mad.

   "Like I said… a collar with my name tag on it, would go a long way… I mean, I can just zap a guy for touching me when I tell them not to, but… other girls? I might end up having a little girl talk with that one."

   Skykid and Rob smiled and exchanged polite glances.

   "Sorry boys. I'm just not into sharing… I'll try not to make a scene at the donut shop."

   Rob started back in easily.

   "You know Panic, she might be right. I don't know, I'm just gonna say. George is about the biggest property owner in town, right? The girl at the donut shop might have noticed that you're… going for donuts with the chief? Maybe, you should start turning down the free donuts."

   Panic stopped eating and looked up. Looked from Merry to Rob, and back and forth a second time before coming to rest on Rob.

   "Really? You're serious…"

   Rob asked Skykid…

   "Sky?"

   "I, uh. I don't know. Been married too many years to have to worry about that stuff. Rob could be right, Panic. Even my Judy? After all these years? I get a slight lecture if a waitress brings me any free stuff."

   Panic looked over at Merry, stuffing a huge chunk of almost the entire crab leg into her mouth at once.

   "Merry. I'll turn down free donuts, but, I get the coffee refills. If you have to say something to the donut lady about the donuts? That's your deal. Just do me a favor, and try to keep her out of the emergency room, all right?"

   Merry smiled as she giggled and shoved the last of the crab into her mouth.

   "Thank you, honey. I mean, it's either that, or… you get the dog collar we talked about. Your choice."

   Things went well enough through dinner. A few men snuck peeks of Merry's legs, and a few men got the stink eye from their own dates, who weren't all dolled up and overdressed like she was.

   On the ride home, the GPS took them on back roads they hadn't driven out on. Merry was still in the front seat. Panic joked about Rob getting the Merry peek a boo show twice now, and he had reneged on drinks for dinner.

   "Sorry Panic, I plum forgot. I apologize for staring at your old lady's legs every time she walked to the bathroom. I swear she has a bladder the size of a mouse."

   Everyone laughed.

   "Part of the game plan, boys. We girls like to walk around the room any chance we get, if we think we're pulling it off. We claim we're touching up our hair and face, but it's all bullshit. Us girls are bad… we follow each other to the restroom, and take shots at each other. If one of us thinks we outclassed the other? We mention in the bathroom, could you please get your man to quit staring at me? It's embarrassing. We're polite about it, but… when you leave the bathroom? You know you're getting called a bitch. And we like it."

   They were about to turn off at a crossroads, when Merry about jumped up in her seat, all excited like a little girl.

   "Rob! Turn in here! Look at the pretty bikes…"

   Rob turned in on instinct from being at Merry's beck and call most of the night, before he even realized it. He recovered as soon as he got in the parking lot.

   "Uh, Merry? I really don't think we should be going in there."

   "Why not? I like bikes. Come on…"

   "Skykid?"

   "I'm with you Rob… doesn't look like our kinda place. Merry, we can hit the one bar just out of town, back at home base, if you want. I'm with Rob on this one."

   Rob eyed Panic in the rear view mirror.

   Panic smiled.

   "Merry. I don't think the boys are comfortable here. I think they like the redneck kinda bar more, you know?"

   Merry already had her door open. Rob had no choice but to stop and let her out. She was over and admiring the bikes in a second flat.

   Merry walked back over.

   "Park the car, Robbie. You can get us a pitcher of cheap beer here, I'm a cheap drunk. Don't be a baby. Come on…"

   Rob parked the car. Skykid didn't say a word. Rob eyed Panic up, turning around in the driver's seat once parked.

   "Panic? We're supposed to be staying out of trouble. This looks like the exact sort of place to get into trouble. Will you do something?"

   Skykid coughed.

   "Boys? We're not going to be the only ones packing in here. Just stating the obvious."

   Panic jogged up to Merry. Still standing a foot away from the line of big custom Harley's. She started walking up to the door.

   "Merry…"

   Merry smiled at him.

   "Honey? You know this is okay. You know why. I'm having fun with your boyfriends. Don't say a word, and tease them to come in. If you're still a little ticked off later tonight? Well… you'll just have something to smack my ass for, won't you?"

   Merry stalked in. Panic wanted to stay close to Merry, but she was walking ahead, and he had to motion Rob and Sky to follow. When the boys reluctantly walked up, Rob was okay with it, and Skykid had to follow.

   "Change your diapers, boys. Merry likes bikes."

   Rob quipped.

   "Panic? I go to places like this back home, where I know people. Where they know me. I'm not making fun, when I tell you Skykid is… not used to a place like this. No offense, Frenchie."

   "None taken. Panic, she's gonna stick out like a sore thumb here. Get her the fuck out of here after one drink. Do it for Frenchie."

   "Just be polite, guys. It'll be fine…"

   When they went in, it was a complete biker bar. There was no sign saying "no colors", rather there was a sign saying "colors and bikes welcome". Skykid didn't like that sign he stopped to read. He muttered something under his breath. No one could hear him, but it couldn't have been good. As far as Skykid was concerned, they might as well have put a human skull on the doorstep.

   Merry already had a standing spot at the bar. The place had loud music. A lot of guys wearing outlaw biker colors. A baseball bat close at hand up behind the barmaid. Merry walked over and dragged Rob and Sky up to the bar with her, and Panic took one side of her, while the boys took the other side.

   Merry looked at Rob and held her palm up and out. Rob nodded. Merry ordered, there was no one else at the short bar. Everyone else was either at a table in groups, or in the back around the dart machine and the pool tables.

   "Pitcher of beer."

   The little barmaid gave Merry a look.

   "We don't have gourmet shit here, lady. You sure you're in the right place? It's not really a private club, but, you know…"

   Merry looked around at what the little barmaid's hand indicated.

   "I'm sure. I like to look at the bikes. Pitcher of beer. Whatever you got is fine…"

   "Listen bitch. We don't get a lot of rich cunts in here. I'm trying to be nice. You ain't taking the hint. So? Get the fuck out."

   Merry looked at her three boys in tow, and smiled without losing her cool. Merry leaned over the bar, and looked down, seeing the little girl standing on a milk crate to still not look her in the face. She let her eyes come up from the milk crate, up the girl's skinny body, and rested on her eyes.

   Rob and Skykid both started to say something, and Merry cut them off. Out of character for her, it stopped them cold.

   "Boys? I can handle this. Listen to me, little girl. You look like you weigh all of about 80 pounds, and that's soaking fucking wet. I'm trying to be polite, but… if you insist? I'm going to drag your little coked up skank ass off of your little milk crate, and smack the ever loving shit right out of you. Last chance. Pitcher of beer."

   The girl smirked at her with a shit eating grin.

   "Cunt. Look around you. I have friends here. I'd like to see you try it."

   "Would you really? That's it. I'm done being polite about this shit… I gave you three chances…"

   Merry stalked right into the back, and looked around. Stood at the entrance to the pool and dart room, posed hand on hip. Pointing at the guys.

   Skykid put his face in his palm. Rob smiled at Panic, but it wasn't a friendly thing. Rob would keep his cool, though. He addressed the barmaid.

   "Ma'am. Was that all really necessary."

   The little barmaid looked at him now with her shit eating grin.

   "Fuck you too."

   All Rob said was…

   "No thanks."

   "Excuse me?"

   Rob raised his voice for her.

   "I said… no… thanks…"

   "I don't believe this shit."

   The little barmaid had to hop up to aim her little remote at the jukebox, which cut the music. Everyone turned to look.

   Merry was still standing at the entrance to the back pool and dart room, waiting to be acknowledged.

   "I'm sorry, boys. Who's in charge here?"

   The guys shooting pool and throwing darts all stopped, stood up straight and looked at her. Looked at each other. A predictably big guy walked right up to her, and stood there with his big arms crossed over his chest.

   "That would be me, I guess."

   He leaned down to peer into Merry's face, he was that tall.

   "Do you need something?"

   Several more guys, from regular to huge, now sauntered over to Merry. The same thing was going on up at the bar, and the smirking tiny barmaid was obviously in her glory.

   Rob just smiled at the guys suddenly standing near them.

   "Hi guys. Nice night out, huh?"

   The guys were crossing their arms, and nodding and smiling at Panic and Rob and Skykid. Not doing anything, but obviously waiting for some cue.

   Merry addressed the guy in the back that claimed to be in charge.

   "Sorry to interrupt you boys, but yeah, I need something. Which one of you boys is responsible for that little thing up there serving drinks? I'm trying to be polite, and she keeps calling me a bitch, calling me a cunt. I already flashed her… twice… so, I'm guessing she ain't nobody in particular. Figured I'd come and make sure, before I asked her to dance. I want my pitcher of beer, and I'm trying to not have girls dance night."

   "You flashed her?"

   "Yep."

   The big guy nodded now.

   "You somebody?"

   "I'm property."

   He raised his voice.

   "You know anyone here?"

   "I'm D.C."

   "Do… I gotta make calls on you, lady?"

   "If you have to. Sure."

   And Merry dug into her little drawstring purse. Panic and Rob and Sky were certain she was just about to taser the guy, which was of course going to be the exact wrong thing to do, at the exact wrong time, in the exact wrong place. But, they were exactly wrong. Merry came up with what looked to be an otherwise ordinary business card. She handed it to the big guy.

   "Sorry to bother you guys, but… she's a real…"

   The big guy flipped her business card over, and studied the back. Smiled. Handed it to the big guy near him, who also smiled. Passed it to two or three others, who all smiled.

   "Oh, Georgie. Time to go and handle your side piece. Take this polite woman up with you, and introduce them, would you?"

   "I got this… ma'am? If you would follow me… this ain't a problem."

   Merry smiled and took her little business card back, and interred it back into her drawstring fabric pouch.

   "Sorry to bother you boys, just figured I'd rather not make a scene."

   "You're all good. The fine gentleman who signed this card. I knew him. You know where he is now?"

   "No. I wouldn't be allowed to say even if I did."

   The big guy smiled and nodded. Shook her hand politely.

   "You got a name?"

   "I'm Merry. D.C. calls me 'Christmas'. My rap sheet? Calls me 'Bloody Mary'…"

   The big guy chuckled.

   "Oh my god. I think I know this fairy tale. You ain't the girl from D.C, what that put some pig's wife in the emergency room?"

   Merry sighed, and smiled all sweet. Raised her hand.

   "Guilty."

   "Georgie? Introduce your side piece. And for god's sake, talk some sense into her, would ya?"

   "I'm on it. Ma'am? After you…"

   The big guy went back to his game of pool, but not after waving his hand and giving a thumbs up sign to the guys crowding the boys at the bar.

   Georgie walked up to the bar, smiling.

   "Boys? Everyone say 'Hi' to Bloody Mary. She's family. Are these fine gentlemen with you, Missy?"

   "Yes. They are."

   "How wonderful."

   The big guys that had been crowding the boys at the bar? Were laughing, and clapping the boys in the back now. One said…

   "Hey guys, we're not here to bust your balls, we're here to buy you a drink, and make sure you have a good time!"

   The other guys with him laughed and hooted. Georgie leaned his considerable bulk over the bar, looking down at the little barmaid. Who was wagging her head and still trying to act like a bitch.

   "What is this shit, Georgie? I don't know this bitch from---"

   "Ma'am? Boys? Give us a second, while I tune this station in…"

   He leaned over the bar and grabbed a handful of the little girl's shirt and yanked her up to look into his suddenly mean looking face.

   "Shut. Your. Cock-hole. We had this talk before, and we better not have this talk again. This… is family. You? Are not. Like I give a fuck you're drinking behind the bar, it ain't my till you're into. You are doing rails behind the bar, and your fucking nose is running like a goddamned faucet, and your mouth is running faster than a treadmill. This nice lady flashed you two three times, and maybe if you weren't so drunk and railed up, you'd a fucking noticed. Now… I want you to change yer attitude. Immediately. We getting anywhere?"

   "Georgie! I don't---"

   Georgie narrowed his eyes and started getting red in the face. He hissed into her face.

   "If you knew who you were embarrassing me in front of? You'd know I'm just about to smack the taste right out of your mouth… this…"

   And he bodily grabbed her by the head, and pointed it at Merry.

   "…is Christmas. Also known, as Bloody Mary. Show some fucking respect for family…"

   Then he bodily pointed her grasped head at the three men Merry was with.

   "And whoever these fine gentlemen are? Are her guests. Jukebox? Back on. Drinks? Served. Your fucking mouth? Sugar better come out of it from here on out tonight. You wanna know why? Because I ain't gonna lay a finger on you. I'm gonna let her smack you around. This is royalty. She put pig-wife's in the emergency room, with heads split open like a fucking canoe. If you give her any more shit? That's going to be you. And no, I can't do a thing about it. Deal with it. Don't… say a single, fucking, word."

   He released her to fall back down onto her little milk crate.

   Merry went back to ordering her pitcher of cheap beer. The guys that had been crowding them? Started laughing at the girl, and suggesting top shelf drinks for Merry and her companions. The guys all introduced themselves. Skykid got some huge guy putting his arm around his shoulder, steering him into the bar, for shots. As did Panic and "Little Robbie".

   Amid all the sudden arms on shoulders, apologies, and friendly smiling bearded faces… it became obvious that no one, except for Panic or his two buddies, would place a single finger on Merry, much less get within a foot of her, except to hold their hand out and wait for her to shake it.

   Merry just smiled at the little barmaid, who would barely look at her, and finally tried to apologize to her. Merry just smiled. Stood up and towered over the little 80 pound girl, who looked up at her and winced.

   "Just get the fuck away from me. And stay away…"

   She gulped and scurried away.

   Once out of earshot, Skykid looked over at "Little Robbie", smiling and enjoying another free drink. Rob was sucking a lemon after his tequila shot.

   "Robbie? What the fuck just happened. Am I in some alternate universe or something?"

   "Sky? My best guess? Is someone is banging a biker babe. Not saying any names, but their name rhymes with Panic. Now, again it's just my best guess, but, I'm gonna go out on a limb, and say that our own little Pochahantas? Has her own rap sheet. Apparently, she's known to these fine gentlemen that are treating us so well? Because… she puts cop's wives into the emergency room in her spare time."

   "So… we're safe now."

   "Safe? As long as we have Merry with us? We can go to any biker bar in this state, and get treated like this."

   "Well, that's nice. Who's driving now? The boys are all but pouring shots down our throats, and I didn't wanna offend them, by turning it down, as it were."

   Skykid felt big hands on his shoulders from behind. He glanced over his shoulder.

   "Hey, little dude. I couldn't help but overhear. You guys going anywhere near here?"

   Skykid looked at Rob, who said the name of the little town they were supposed to make it back to.

   The big guy laughed.

   "No problem, little dude. My brother in law? Is a deputy here. Covers your town too. If you boys wanna just relax, shoot some pool, throw some darts, have some drinks and have fun? I'll personally follow you guys home on my bike. Going right past there anyways. Every cop knows my bike, no one will dare pull me and any car with me over. Trust me, enjoy your night. You can weave like George Jones if you wanna, as long as you don't run into anything? It's fine. Loosen up. It's the least I can do for you, the way Georgie's side piece treated Christmas. You have any problems with the locals? Drop the name 'Curious George', that's me. Doubt they do anything but run away from you. You have my permission to use my name. Now… go back to having fun. Life's too short to do anything else."

   Panic wandered over to Rob and Skykid with a big frosted mug of dark beer in his hand.

   "I guess you guys figured out by now, Merry was having fun with you guys, stopping here. I didn't know this was gonna happen, but… is it so bad?"

   Panic went in the back room to play pool. Skykid lowered his sunglasses down over his eyes, like he did drinking around the campfires.

   "Fuck it. When in Rome… ya know, for a second there? I thought we were dead. Now? I feel like a cop in a cop bar. And? I'm suddenly glad Speedy ain't here… if you're catching my drift."

   Rob entered the conversation on Skykid's other side.

   "Sky? I'm friends with a couple bikers down south in my neck a the woods. I get this kinda treatment, when I stop anywhere the guys know who I'm friends with. Honestly? The moment Merry went in the back, I figured it out. She was way too cool about the situation. Panic? May I suggest you oil her up and rape her twice tonight, to say thanks for us? I thought I was gonna have to change Skykid's diaper…"

   Skykid laughed.

   "Robbie? You fucking ignorant Kraut. I would of shit myself? But my ass was too tight to shit, ya know?"

   Rob and Skykid felt hands on both their shoulders and glanced to see Merry smiling at them.

   "Sorry, I just had to have fun with you boys. You know how I don't drink much, and I hardly ever go out to bars? The only time I do, is places like this. In case you couldn't tell, I can get falling down drunk if I felt like it, and no one would dare lay a finger on me."

   The little coked up bartender filled up the shot glasses in front of them, and scurried away from Merry without looking up at her.

   "Now, I just happened to hear you boys talking just now? I think I'm actually gonna get drunk for once. And, if you boys wanna help me out with a teeny little favor? Uhm… if you can talk Panic, into 'oiling me up and raping me twice'? I think that's a great idea…"

   They both started apologizing, explaining they didn't know she was standing behind them…

   "Guys? I'm not the least bit shy about it. Honestly, if Panic doesn't take advantage of me? I'm a gonna take advantage of him. Don't expect us to make it up for breakfast, boys… I got plans for my little Panic…"

   Merry turned around suddenly and yelled…

   "Where's my bitch !"

   The place erupted in drunken laughter, and a couple big guys were pointing back at the pool and darts room. Merry did her shot, and stalked back, just starting to get a hair tipsy.

   She grabbed Panic roughly by the chin. Shoved him back on the pool table, and laughed as she practically crawled up on top of him, making out to the sounds of everyone hooting and hollering and yelling.

   So he could hear her over the din of laughter and commotion that any college frat house would have been proud of, she rammed her lips up to his ear and told him.

   "Little boy? You just wait till I get you back to our cabin tonight. Oh, do I got plans for you…"

   Everyone laughed, as she winked at him and grabbed his crotch obscenely. She dragged him away from his pool game, sat him in a chair, and sat down astride his lap. She threw her arms around his neck and head, and made out with him for a while. Anyone that walked past, just laughed and raised their drink.

   Merry took out the "cigarette" they shared before the movie, and had forgotten to get into before the all you can eat crab legs dinner. When he went to grab it, she shook her head. "No hands" in his ear. Merry held it for either of them as they finished it.

   "I'm your property… right?"

   Panic nodded.

   "You… are mine. I don't share. Do we understand each other?"

   Panic smiled and nodded.

   "Good. I'm having a polite talk with your little donut whore…"

   Merry grabbed him by the chin rough, and studied his face.

   "Don't you dare lie to me. You really don't know, that she's hitting on you, do you?"

   Panic shook his head "no".

   "Hmm. You just keep looking right in my eyes, okay?"

   Panic nodded. Merry put her face directly in his. Studied his eyes like when she was watching for Gamma responses during science girl's testing phase.

   "You… look me right in my fucking eyes, and you tell me the truth. You really don't know the donut girl likes you?"

   Panic shook his head no. Furrowed his brow at her.

   "Shh. I believe you. No… don't you dare look away from me. You look me right in these two eyes, mister… the night we first met, when you and your George friend first wandered into my steakhouse in the city… George told you I liked you, didn't he? I overheard Speedy talking about it. Is that true? Eyes…"

   Panic nodded yes.

   Merry studied his face, a look of incredulity on hers.

   "How could you have missed it… I thought you weren't interested."

   Panic furrowed his brow. Looking confused. He shrugged.

   "You keep looking at my eyes. You understand me?"

   Panic nodded yes.

   "I'm not being mean. I want the truth. Do you sometimes misunderstand people? What they say, what they mean. Just every once in a while, and you play it off as a joke. I'm not being mean, but I want the truth."

   Panic nodded yes.

   "Eyes on mine. I'm not being mean, I won't make fun of you. Ever. But, I need to know. Eyes! Good… don't you dare look away. I'm not being mean to you… when I ask you this… are you, like a little kid in some way? That's why you just do the right thing all the time. Because it's what you were taught when you were little? Answer me."

   Panic nodded yes.

   Merry smiled. Put her arms around his head and neck, and pulled him in to make out with him.

   "Shh. Its fine. You don't have to worry about it. I'll handle that shit. All right? You… just do what you do. Are you okay with that? Make sure."

   Panic nodded yes.

   "Shh. I've heard about this. I fucking like it, do you understand me? From now on, if I take over and handle someone, you'll just let me go, are we clear on that? Do you have a problem with it?"

   "I don't think so. Like what?"

   "Things like… your little donut girl. When I handle her, you'll just let me handle her. All right? It's not your problem. I'll handle it. Okay?"

   Panic nodded yes, still looking her right in her eyes, like she asked, no, like she demanded. Merry smiled…

   "Now then. You… will not, accept any more, free donuts. Will you?"

   Panic shook his head no.

   "You promise?"

   Panic shook his head yes. Merry's smile broadened.

   "Here's what we're going to do. We, are going to go up to the bar, and have a few drinks. Then? I'm going to the restroom. You? Are going to go out the side door. There's a picnic table out there. You'll sit there, and you'll wait for me. Are we clear on that?"

   Panic smiled and shook his head yes.

   "Good. When we have our drinks, up at the bar? I'm going to kiss you your drinks, is that clear?"

   He nodded. Smiled.

   "Bar. Drinks. Me bathroom. You picnic table. Then? Fun."

   Merry stood up off of him, and smiled. She made an itching motion with her finger, to follow her. She pointed at a seat at the bar. Panic sat there, and she took the one next to him. The coke skank came up and waited patiently. Merry flipped a 20 onto the bar and said…

   "I wanna small glass of that green shit I just had. No ice…"

   Then disregarded her and turned her attention to Panic. She grabbed him by the chin, studied his face, and started kissing him like a schoolgirl. People chuckled. After a time, she noticed the glass of green stuff she liked had appeared, and her change was a pile of small bills.

   Without taking her eyes off of Panic, she took a sip of the green glass. Smiled. Took another, and kissed him. Skykid and Rob down the bar pointed and smiled. She did it back and forth this way, several times, until the green glass was gone. She glanced at her pile of small bills, and pointed at the glass, which magically refilled itself and the pile of bills disappeared except for a single. She repeated the performance.

   "I'm taking a piss… You? Go and do whatever you're supposed to be doing…"

   Merry disappeared around the corner to the ladies room. Panic wandered off. Ended up out the side door, and walked towards the back and found the picnic table Merry had spoke of. Looked like the out of the way sort of thing any business would have out back or off to the side, for the employees to have a place to take a break. He sat down and waited for Merry, who wasn't long in joining him. They could talk now, the din of the bar was much less outside in the cool night air. He rose to greet her.

   "Sit."

   She had shoved him into the seat.

   "Turn around, and face the picnic table."

   He did it without question. Merry never did anything but make him feel good or great, why question anything.

   Merry walked around the picnic table, leaning over and smiling at him.

   "Stay."

   He stayed. Smiling. They were alone. She crawled across the picnic table, never once taking her slightly tipsy eyes off of his. She crawled to a sitting position, to be seated with her ass on the picnic table. She had flounced her dress out so she didn't sit on it as she took her tabled seat, her high heels on either side of his own seat, almost touching him.

   "I didn't have to piss. I took something off and put it in my little purse. Wanna guess what it was?"

   Panic shrugged. Merry smiled.

   "You said you like my ankles. Grab them."

   It happened.

   "Feel my legs. Start at my ankles. Up my legs, and back down them. It turns me on. Don't stop doing it."

   "Oh, yeah. That's right. No, go all the way up my thighs. Feel every inch of my legs… yeah."

   "Now? I want you to lift my dress up. I want you to see what I took off."

   Panic looked at Hitler's mustache. He smiled.

   "One hand, on a leg. All the way up, all the way down, all around it. Never stop that… play with Hitler, with the other hand. You know what to do, you do it all the time. Don't stop with my leg or my twat."

   After a while and she was breathing heavy and giggling, she continued.

   "Now. Both hands. On the legs. Give Hitler a kiss. You know what to do, you do it all the time. Don't stop with the hands on the legs, or your tongue. I don't care if the cops come? I'll fucking tell you when you're allowed to quit. Do you understand me?"

   He smiled though she couldn't see it, nodded his head in the affirmative, and set about what she wanted. Merry grabbed his head and held it in, and was heaving her air in and out. Enjoying it. She hissed at him.

   "Don't you dare stop…"

   The side door opened, and she grabbed his head firmly just in case he thought he was going to stop.

   It was Curious George.

   "You guys all right?"

   Merry laughed out loud.

   "We-we're… f-fine…"

   And started laughing in between trying to catch her labored breath. Waved at him friendly, then went back to both hands on Panic's head.

   CG laughed and waved and yelled "have fun, kids…" and disappeared. CG wandered back to the bar. Rob and Sky were seated near him. They asked if he had seen their friend, or Merry for that matter.

   "Oh. Yeah, they're out the back. Don't bother them. Christmas is getting her twat licked on the picnic table, I doubt they want disturbed."

   He had delivered the news like he was commenting on the weather. Skykid looked at Rob, who looked back at him. They both looked to the side door, and back at each other. Busted out laughing. Rob subsided into chuckles of amusement, and Skykid ended up all but slapping the bar laughing.

   Rob laughed.

   "Sky? Ain't none of the boys gonna believe this shit."

   "Robbie? I'm here watching the shit, and I don't fucking believe it. Judy would gut me like a fish… but, what the fuck got into Merry tonight? Sweet little Merry… is a complete fucking lunatic…"

   "Well… other than electrocuting a guy for touching her hip, you mean…"

   "That? Was funny. And? She fucking warned him, fair and square. I mean, other than that? Sweet little girl."

   They both looked at the door, and Rob commented.

   "Yeah. I thought she was just a smart girl, who dropped out of college after a few years."

   Skykid laughed now.

   "Well? She still is… she's just fucking crazy, too."

   Rob added as dry as could be.

   "You act like Panic's actually all there. That motherfucker is at least as crazy as I am."

   "Coming from you? That, actually means something… Rob? Those two are made for each other."

   "No, you're right. They make each other happy."

   "I still can't get over Merry all painted up like that. I mean, she always was the cutest thing, but… Jesus H. Christ…"

   "Sky? I can't believe it's the same girl. She tried to hide being… gorgeous."

   "Rob? We have to wait for our… escort home. You know that, right? How long do bars stay open in this state anyways."

   "I've been to Pennsylvania before with Panic a couple times on trips north. 2:00 am, they lock the doors. 2:30, they kick you out. Private clubs are 3:00 and 3:30… this is a public bar, so, 2:00 and 2:30."

   Sky looked around him.

   "Oh right, like everyone obeys the law around here…"

   "Well… if they do, another hour, hour and a half. Unless they lock the doors and we're trapped here till sunup. Who knows."

   "We could call for a ride. I just don't wanna leave the car here. We're actually really close to home, believe it or not. We're just coming in the other end of town that we're used to coming in on. I honestly don't think any of our local cops would care once they saw Panic in the car."

   "Fuck it. You can't drag Merry out of here without a tow truck. We gotta wait."

   Both of them had soft drinks and waited patiently. Merry finally came in the side door, with Panic dragged by the hand behind her. She was smiling like an idiot. Just like he was. Guys that knew what had been going on were hooting and hollering like a college frat party. Merry and Panic just waved like politicians to everyone, and made their way over.

   Merry's hair was slightly messed up, and she was still breathing a wee bit heavy, and smiling. Rob just shook his head. He couldn't help but notice, that when Merry plopped onto the bar stool next to him? Her bare ass peeked out from under her skirt. He glanced up from this revelation, and Merry met his gaze. She smiled and wiggled her eyebrows at him, and started giggling.

   Curious George wandered quietly over.

   "Hey guys. Christmas. Look, I don't know what your plans are? My old lady will freak if I'm out too late. I'm leaving in about a half an hour, if you want that escort home. I know the town you're talking about, we're only minutes away. Merry? You look like you and your old man had some fun…"

   Merry smiled at him.

   "We did."

   "You guys can stay as late as you want to. It's the weekend, we lock the doors and go till daybreak, but… I ain't getting dishes thrown at my head, if you know what I mean…"

   Skykid smiled.

   "No no, we're all good. We just stopped in for… one drink. As you can see. We would be honored if you would escort us back. Once you get us off the road on the dirt? We're home free. We owe you one."

   "No problem. Merry? Sorry about you getting off on the wrong foot. That's not really my side piece, that's just a joke. She's just an earner. You know the drill. I got a wife and kids. Anyways, thanks for not killing the little rail queen there… she's more trouble than she's worth. I'm gonna go back and talk shop? Next time you see me, we can blow this taco stand. Merry? Say hi to the D.C. crowd you make it back. If you stick around here? Anytime. You guys are all nice citizens. You're welcome back. Everyone knows your faces now, if you wanna bring a friend that knows how to fly straight. If you don't know what that means? Christmas here, can clue you in on that. When she sobers up. See you guys in a bit…"

   CG was off to a little pow wow in the back.

   Merry was quite calmed down, and joined them in their soft drinks binge. As did Panic. True to his quiet promise, CG appeared behind them, and said he was going if they wanted to. They did. Guys waved, and a few they had socialized with shook hands with everyone and they left.

   Skykid now had Merry in the front seat with him. He agreed with Rob's earlier joke about the possibility of "love stains" if the two of them were in the back seat together for five minutes. Skykid was driving and Rob was complaining about being 6'5" or 6'6" and being in the back of his own car. Apparently, he had never ridden in the back of his own car before. First time for everything. Skykid drove because they all judged him the best choice.

   The Harley was loud as hell and they had no incidents for the several minutes to the dirt road they were good on. Rob called the night watch to announce their imminent arrival. Skykid drove slowly out the trails and ended up at the main bunk house camp site, and a bunch of the boys were still up.

   Everyone was drinking, it was the weekend after all. Merry and Panic didn't stay much longer than one soft drink each. They each grabbed a six pack of soft drinks out the cooler, and were about to set off. Rob and Skykid protested, they wanted proof of their wild tales of fun and adventure.

   Merry rubbed her slightly askew hair, and smiled.

   "Boys? I don't usually drink much, and, I hardly ever go out like this. Me and Panic here were celebrating something for his case. Panic's been feeling bad about not working on stuff with his shoulder? We decided to treat Sky and little Robbie to dinner and a movie, and some fun. The crazier it sounds? It's all true. We're all half hammered. As much as I would love to stay and verify the stories? Me and Panic have some stuff to tend to… boys? Enjoy."

   Merry and Panic half walked, and half staggered. Giggling like high school kids sneaking out for an all night binge. Merry had to really watch her step, in her heels. Before her and Panic faded into darkness, she stepped out of her heels so she could walk up the trail to their little cabin without risking a broken ankle in the dark.

   As the two lovebird's last giggle faded into the night up the dark trail and around the trail's bend, the first topic of conversation was naturally how Merry looked with her face on and all dolled up. Rob and Skykid both had high resolution cell phone pictures of Merry before her hair got slightly mussed late in the evening.

   A beer infused friendly argument ensued, over which Merry pic was the best shot of her. One liked the initial pose in the road waiting on them. A video of her sashaying around the restaurant was another favorite. A pic of her all but raping Panic on the bar pool table was another. Another of what appeared to be Merry giving Panic a lap dance across the bar room, was yet another.

   Everyone shook their head in disbelief, but they had seen her with nothing different but her hair slightly mussed just now. The way she was hanging all over Panic was another testimony to the stories. The story of Merry and the bikers seemed hard to believe, except for all the pictures of Merry posing and laughing with the guys flying colors.

   Rob and Skykid both agreed on one thing, that the lady at the donut shop was going to get a talking to, and after seeing Merry towering over the little girl at the bar, and realizing the lady at the donut shop wasn't any bigger… well… everyone already knew Merry didn't allow any man to so much as touch her without her permission, or risk getting electrocuted. It was then much easier to believe she was equally possessive of another woman giving Panic the eye.

   Everyone had trouble believing that Merry had some kind of reputation for putting cop's wives in the emergency room. Yet, she had just picked some biker bar at complete random out of her home state… and they ended up already knowing about her and her AKA.

   Rob added, with a detailed and lengthy description… how they thought they were dead, then the deal with the coked up barmaid and how that turned out. Rob added, that in the course of the big biker settling the coke skank down tending bar, how he had mentioned how lucky the little girl was, that whoever wasn't here. Nobody could easily believe that their sweet little Merry, with her reading glasses, and her college style lectures on male female relationships? Was not only capable of snapping her fingers and turning the whole bad situation around 180 degrees, but that the rest of the night was practically VIP treatment because no one seemed to want any trouble to result from Merry being slighted so badly.

   Rob, explaining that he had a few biker buddies back home down south? Caught the guy saying that the "nice lady" had "flashed" her 2 or 3 times, and she was too drunk and coked up to have seen it.

   Rob had to explain to drunk rednecks, that didn't mean Merry had shown the girl her boobs. Merry had some kind of "thing" she could do/say/show, that instantly identified her to any of them she ever ran across. And that judging by their reactions once they knew who she was and where she came from and whoever she once ran with? The entire outlaw biker bar was somewhat tight if she were to give a bad report to teacher.

   Rob then spoke to them all…

   "Another thing, guys. We all know Speedy. He's a state cop, and I'm telling you here and now, Speedy himself would have walked right back out of that bar, and no cop would go in there on a call, without calling for backup. Sweet little Merry? She's in there, and we're surrounded and about to be dead."

   "She marches right into the back, and demands to know who's in charge here. Has a little talk? Ten seconds later… we're all VIPs. All night. I don't know who she knows, and who she blows, er… that's Panic obviously, I mean who she used to blow or know? That place was filled to the brim with one percent guys… I'm telling you, here and now, there was a magic bubble around little Merry there. They literally, won't get within two feet of her, and so much as touch her arm, except to hold their hand out, and wait for her to shake their hand."

   "Now… Merry? Is his girl now. They're in love. It's fucking obvious. Hell, lord himself knows, I got a mouth on me and a warped sense of humor. I was fucking with Merry all night. I'm telling you, I about shit myself thinking about it, after I seen that magic bubble around her, in that place. I don't know who she can call, but, it's the devil himself."

   "I'm the sergeant at arms, and it's not my job to hurt you, it's really my job to keep you all from getting hurt. Do not put your hands on Merry, or go too far teasing her. For one, you might have to deal with Panic over it, and even I wouldn't think that's a real bright idea. Honestly, then you got the matter of Merry herself. I think Skykid said it best, before any of us even knew. Lookee? No touchee. You, have, been, warned. I honestly have no idea what the connection is? It's fucking obvious, she's some kind of… I don't fucking know what to call it… outlaw biker… royalty… princess… some shit like that."

   Skykid, ever quiet, amazed everyone by speaking up. A rarity for him to raise his voice and address the group.

   "Guys? Merry is not just a matter of Panic. A matter of whoever she knows, knew, or can call. She herself puts cop's wives in the emergency room. And all those one percent guys back there? Already knew the story from out of state, they were amazed to meet her in person. They all knew her, before they met her? As Bloody Mary. Might be because it used to be her favorite drink in college? Then again, might not be. This smart frog, recommends… lookee, no touchee."